Nerd Love

I found my best friend in the whole world and in 21 days I'm going to marry him. We're complete opposites, him an introvert, me an extrovert but we're both huge nerds. I joke when I call us a nerd power couple but its pretty true. D&D/WoW fanatic meets aspiring fantasy writer/critic and con-runner aficionado, we're pretty awesome together. I'm super excited about our future and this next big step.
Tonight is my bachelorette party and it looks like they'll be a good turn out. It seems like almost every post on here says something to the effect of, "I haven't written in a long time, but that's going to change". So this time I'm not going to say anything. I'm just going to do it.
Robert's really helping encourage me to start writing again and I want to. Real life is just so hard to set aside. But I'm going to make a serious effort and keep up with it. Here's the declaration now hopefully I can live up to it. Better clean up the house since the rental company is showing it this afternoon.

Until later...

SF Movie Experiment Part 1: Epic Fail

Copied from livejournal account I stupidly created last summer and will now delete.
Alrighty. I used to have a blog and it was whiny, boring and pretty much just me talking to myself. It had no purpose. So! I came up with this idea, helped a little by the movie Julie & Julia as well as an interview I heard on the radio about a girl similarly inspired by that movie to listen to the top 100 records ever made. She's already doing records and I'm not such a great cook. So when I found the Rough Guide to Science Fiction Movies at work, written by none other than John Scalzi (I met him at ArmadilloCon two years ago), I thought PERFECT! Scalzi is the master of the blogosphere himself and what better way to expand my SF repertoire than by watching what he says are the top 50 science fiction movies ever. Growing up my family watched Star Trek, but that's about as far as my young science fiction education went. Not a bad place to start though. I read a lot more than I watched movies or tv and most of that reading was fantasy. So here are the terms:

I will watch at least 1 of the movies on Scalzi's list a week. (I'm going to try to do more but we'll see how that goes with working full time and applying to graduate school.)
Then I will blog about it within 24 hours of said viewing. (Best to keep it fresh.)
After that I'll tweet and facebook about my entry hoping that this can start a discussion amongst my friends and colleagues!

Stay tuned to find out what my first pick will be!

So obviously none of that happened. I did watch Blade Runner, I never posted about it and my full time job/applying to grad school did get the best of me. But! My grad school applications will be in soon(-ish) and then I will try this experiment again. So stay tuned for that. Why am I blogging again you might ask? -My nonexistent readers. Well I'm procrastinating working on my writing sample for graduate school of course! This is my last desperate cry to put it off though. Back to the grinding stone. I sure hope all this stress is worth it. :/

Taking the Leap

So I really want to go to graduate school. But I graduated early from college which was a huge stress my last semester and I didn't have time to get my applications in for this year. Then when real life set in and I started working on my fiction I thought maybe I'd take some time off to work on my novel. But I've recently realized that maybe I was just being a big fat chicken. That part of my future is so important to me that it's hugely scary. What if I don't get in? I never went through this stress in high school but the top 10% rule was still in effect and I knew I'd get into A&M. But I'm going to take the plunge. Although after a few hours research this morning made me realize how really little time I have!!! I have to take the GRE next month!!! Geeze. So I'm gonna get to work on my statement of intent right away. Also I now have to decide which essays to send and get them ready. SCARY!!! I'm going to get to work on all that right now in fact. But maybe the immediacy of it will kick my butt in gear!

Packing Time!

I'm supposed to be packing right now. I'll get around to it. But I did get my Blood Elf hunter to 50 today! Now I'm on the long hard road to 80. It's going to take forever. :/ I'm trying to fight my alt fever and just stick with this one for now. But my ADD is screaming at me that's it's sick and tired of using Volley and then Aimed, Arcane Shot followed by Serpent Sting. It needs variety. But hopefully moving into a new place will sooth it's roving nature. Yes my ADD is a thing. Ask anyone else who has finally confronted it instead of ignoring it. Maybe this should be my topic of the day. Ironic since I'm using this blog as a way to procrastinate. Ha!
So about... wow I guess two years ago now. Crazy. I finally submitted to the test for ADD. I had been in denial about it although most people who were closest to me could probably tell I had it just from the way I tell stories. Well you read these blogs you probably could have guessed too. Lol. Ever since then I've been having this on going revelation about how much ignoring it has hurt my life. You would never guess the random things it can affect. Like being able to cook (or not in my case). Because I can and I love cooking but its so hard to concentrate on it. I always missed steps or didn't read the recipe right. Or even something as innocuous as running into things a lot. That can be a side effect of ADD. I do not have the Hyperactive part of ADD so growing up being smart was usually able to cover up my struggles. But I've come to realize that it's a part of me and I'm not ashamed to talk about it. It's just like having red hair or a big nose. It's there, its a part of me. I'm learning to deal with it, yes sometimes it makes me stand out to people, but I deal with it the best way I know how. Usually by making an awkward joke.
Ok! Enough blogging for today. I should really get some laundry and packing done before the bf gets home. Lol. Until next time.

Lax about blogging...

I've been pretty derelict in my blogging duties as of late. Real life has taken over this past year. It has been an interesting one to say the least. But finally I'm doing something I love, working at a bookstore and can work on my own writing as well as my relationship with my significant other. Next weekend we're moving to a real house we'll be renting instead of this little shitty ass apartment in the ghetto. I'm very excited to have my very own office to decorate and write in. All those real life things really kept me from finding time to write but I got my butt in gear enough to send in the first chapter of my novel for the ArmadilloCon Writer's Workshop. I just found out today that I was put in the critique group with the Guest of Honor Rachel Caine (check out her Weather Warden series, it's awesome) and the amazing Patrice Sarath (writer of Gordath Wood, also super cool series). This was a huge surprise and I'm elated to have gotten chosen for this group. The only thing that could have been cooler was if I was put in the group with the Editor Guest of Honor. Although I would have been terrified! So I think this worked out for the best. My friend and fellow con-runner Katy Pace will also be in my group. I'm thrilled to know someone and hopefully won't feel as awkward as the last time I did this workshop. I also can't wait to see my friend Phoebe Kitanidis who just had an amazing young adult paranormal called Whisper come out a couple months ago. Anyway this has really kicked me in the pants and I want to start writing/blogging/tweeting more often again. So here's the beginning of many more! I should really go to bed now since it's past 3 in the morning. Lol. I just had a lot of pent up energy tonight. Btw. I just finished Swallowing Darkness by Laurell K. Hamilton and loved it! Really have no desire to read the Anita Blake series but I really like these erotic dark fantasies. Check them out.

The CB, Health Care Scare, and Fears

No I can't write a blog post about just one single thing. I have ADD. This is what you're gonna get. Enjoy it. :D
The CB is what we employees called Cracker Barrel for short. I no longer count myself among their ranks. I really enjoyed (most of) the people I worked with there but waitressing turned out to be too taxing for me to do what I'm supposed to be doing right now, and that's WRITE! It did give me some interesting experiences and the opportunity to meet some interesting people. I was that waitress who wanted to hear all your gossip or would laugh at your funny stories. But I kept telling people I was a writer and working on a novel, which isn't really true. I am a writer and I want to be working on a novel, however I don't seem to be writing much. Part of that is that I was too effing tired all the time when I wasn't working (which was more than I signed on for). The other part that was holding me back I'll cover later so stay tuned. My manager understood and was pretty nice about it. He even left me eligible for rehire if I wanted to go back. So I'm looking for new jobs again but not in so much desperation.
To interrupt this regularly scheduled ramble about my personal life: some political thoughts. I'm at Chic-Fil-a right now, while I ate my breakfast I read the paper and heard about the recent threats against legislatures both red and blue over the Health Care Reform. First can I say form the POV of someone who may need national health care I support it overall. Everything has flaws when it starts out and they're already ironing out the kinks. But I'm fascinated by the anger some people have inside them. I just don't understand the kind of fuel someone would need to draw a noose and pick a representative's name to put on it or to come up with all the awful things they've said on phone calls. It's just a kind of anger I don't understand. I really need to write about this somehow. It's always boggled my mind. When I took a seminar on violence in the American Renaissance (the literary period right before the Civil War) we talked about it. My professor said that he thinks some people have anger closer to the surface than others. I guess my common sense or inherent laziness usually wins out over such fits of anger. Something to chew on...
So the other part of what's been holding me back from writing is fear. Fear holds me back a lot in life. My old boss once told me my fear was like a really big rock I didn't have a carry around. (He's a very dear friend now.) Phillip is also the person who pulled the blinders from my eyes and confronted my about whether or not I was writing. I'm a perfectionist and I know a lot of other writers have this problem too. That internal editor who looks down her horn-rimmed glasses at you and tells you you're not good enough. Well that bitch can stand aside now. I'm going to confront my fear and challenge myself to write just a little bit everyday. And it can suck! I've always remembered the advice John Scalzi gave us at the '08 ArmadilloCon writing workshop. That you can't be afraid to suck. Because everyone sucks in the beginning and if you keep trying one day you won't suck so bad.

Here's to sucking! Now I'm going to get to work. Until later! You'll be hearing more from me. I know I always say that but I mean it this time!

"Country Fresh"

I think I want to start using the phrase "country fresh" like "Don't make me go country fresh on you" or "Don't get country fresh with me". Btw "country fresh" is what Cracker Barrel calls what they want their employees to look like. During training we keep making jokes when we do bad things like, "that's probably not country fresh." The group I was training with was pretty goofy. It was fun! I graduated tonight from Cracker Barrel training and can I say that I'm going to be a bad ass server. Tomorrow is our friends and family day. My parents are actually driving up to support me. How cool are they? I'll let you all know how my first day goes tomorrow! Next week I work 4 shifts all started at either 6 am or 5 am. Am I like totally screwed? Yes. I'm going to have to mainline some caffeine before work. But my new friend Lindsey S. and I are wondering who the hell is even open at 4:30 in the freakin' morning? Btw my new friend Lindsey is awesome and I'm so glad I finally found someone else that managed to slip past Cracker Barrel's "country fresh" standards. We're both not gung-ho Aggie and totally not country at all. So we can commiserate! Woot. We talked about tattoos tonight while waiting in line. How awesome? I had to get rid of my tragus piercing to be able to work at Cracker Barrel. So now my only subversive body alteration is gone. My boyfriend even had to cut it out with pliers because it wouldn't come undone. I haven't taken it out in 2 years. Hopefully it doesn't close up. But I think I'm going to eventually get a tattoo somewhere just to spite Cracker Barrel. Ha! Maybe on my calf? My mom would probably flip out. I heard the top of your foot really hurts so I'm not sure I could do that. I wish I was bad ass enough for full sleeves. Oooo. That would be awesome! Also the first thing I'm going to do after I move and don't work at Cracker Barrel is finally get the monroe lip piercing I've been wanting.

Ok but I'm super excited about my new writing project. I'm hoping it can help me get a regular pattern down so I can work on this and start working on my novel finally at the same time! This new project is a screenplay I was asked to work on with an old friend of mine Jeff Turner. Jeff had a huge role in the beginning of my writing career. I'm so honored that he asked my help on his screenplay. He's already got actors interested in helping him sell it after we're finished. So this could be a huge break for me! It's a thriller which is a little out of my comfort zone but a good experiment for me. I'm going to be doing some research this weekend. Any suggestions of good thrillers I should watch? Think a la Sleeping with the Enemy (according to Jeff). I'll give a review of the movies I watch this weekend!