The Closet Nerd Network

Nerd Love

2011-04-09T09:49:00.003-05:00

I found my best friend in the whole world and in 21 days I'm going to marry him. We're complete opposites, him an introvert, me an extrovert but we're both huge nerds. I joke when I call us a nerd power couple but its pretty true. D&D/WoW fanatic meets aspiring fantasy writer/critic and con-runner aficionado, we're pretty awesome together. I'm super excited about our future and this next big step.
Tonight is my bachelorette party and it looks like they'll be a good turn out. It seems like almost every post on here says something to the effect of, "I haven't written in a long time, but that's going to change". So this time I'm not going to say anything. I'm just going to do it.
Robert's really helping encourage me to start writing again and I want to. Real life is just so hard to set aside. But I'm going to make a serious effort and keep up with it. Here's the declaration now hopefully I can live up to it. Better clean up the house since the rental company is showing it this afternoon.

Until later...

SF Movie Experiment Part 1: Epic Fail

2011-01-06T01:25:00.003-06:00

Copied from livejournal account I stupidly created last summer and will now delete.

Alrighty. I used to have a blog and it was whiny, boring and pretty much just me talking to myself. It had no purpose. So! I came up with this idea, helped a little by the movie Julie & Julia as well as an interview I heard on the radio about a girl similarly inspired by that movie to listen to the top 100 records ever made. She's already doing records and I'm not such a great cook. So when I found the Rough Guide to Science Fiction Movies at work, written by none other than John Scalzi (I met him at ArmadilloCon two years ago), I thought PERFECT! Scalzi is the master of the blogosphere himself and what better way to expand my SF repertoire than by watching what he says are the top 50 science fiction movies ever. Growing up my family watched Star Trek, but that's about as far as my young science fiction education went. Not a bad place to start though. I read a lot more than I watched movies or tv and most of that reading was fantasy. So here are the terms:

I will watch at least 1 of the movies on Scalzi's list a week. (I'm going to try to do more but we'll see how that goes with working full time and applying to graduate school.)
Then I will blog about it within 24 hours of said viewing. (Best to keep it fresh.)
After that I'll tweet and facebook about my entry hoping that this can start a discussion amongst my friends and colleagues!

Stay tuned to find out what my first pick will be!

So obviously none of that happened. I did watch Blade Runner, I never posted about it and my full time job/applying to grad school did get the best of me. But! My grad school applications will be in soon(-ish) and then I will try this experiment again. So stay tuned for that. Why am I blogging again you might ask? -My nonexistent readers. Well I'm procrastinating working on my writing sample for graduate school of course! This is my last desperate cry to put it off though. Back to the grinding stone. I sure hope all this stress is worth it. :/

Taking the Leap

2010-09-07T10:24:00.002-05:00

So I really want to go to graduate school. But I graduated early from college which was a huge stress my last semester and I didn't have time to get my applications in for this year. Then when real life set in and I started working on my fiction I thought maybe I'd take some time off to work on my novel. But I've recently realized that maybe I was just being a big fat chicken. That part of my future is so important to me that it's hugely scary. What if I don't get in? I never went through this stress in high school but the top 10% rule was still in effect and I knew I'd get into A&M. But I'm going to take the plunge. Although after a few hours research this morning made me realize how really little time I have!!! I have to take the GRE next month!!! Geeze. So I'm gonna get to work on my statement of intent right away. Also I now have to decide which essays to send and get them ready. SCARY!!! I'm going to get to work on all that right now in fact. But maybe the immediacy of it will kick my butt in gear!

Packing Time!

2010-08-11T14:08:00.002-05:00

I'm supposed to be packing right now. I'll get around to it. But I did get my Blood Elf hunter to 50 today! Now I'm on the long hard road to 80. It's going to take forever. :/ I'm trying to fight my alt fever and just stick with this one for now. But my ADD is screaming at me that's it's sick and tired of using Volley and then Aimed, Arcane Shot followed by Serpent Sting. It needs variety. But hopefully moving into a new place will sooth it's roving nature. Yes my ADD is a thing. Ask anyone else who has finally confronted it instead of ignoring it. Maybe this should be my topic of the day. Ironic since I'm using this blog as a way to procrastinate. Ha!
So about... wow I guess two years ago now. Crazy. I finally submitted to the test for ADD. I had been in denial about it although most people who were closest to me could probably tell I had it just from the way I tell stories. Well you read these blogs you probably could have guessed too. Lol. Ever since then I've been having this on going revelation about how much ignoring it has hurt my life. You would never guess the random things it can affect. Like being able to cook (or not in my case). Because I can and I love cooking but its so hard to concentrate on it. I always missed steps or didn't read the recipe right. Or even something as innocuous as running into things a lot. That can be a side effect of ADD. I do not have the Hyperactive part of ADD so growing up being smart was usually able to cover up my struggles. But I've come to realize that it's a part of me and I'm not ashamed to talk about it. It's just like having red hair or a big nose. It's there, its a part of me. I'm learning to deal with it, yes sometimes it makes me stand out to people, but I deal with it the best way I know how. Usually by making an awkward joke.
Ok! Enough blogging for today. I should really get some laundry and packing done before the bf gets home. Lol. Until next time.

Lax about blogging...

2010-08-04T03:13:00.003-05:00

I've been pretty derelict in my blogging duties as of late. Real life has taken over this past year. It has been an interesting one to say the least. But finally I'm doing something I love, working at a bookstore and can work on my own writing as well as my relationship with my significant other. Next weekend we're moving to a real house we'll be renting instead of this little shitty ass apartment in the ghetto. I'm very excited to have my very own office to decorate and write in. All those real life things really kept me from finding time to write but I got my butt in gear enough to send in the first chapter of my novel for the ArmadilloCon Writer's Workshop. I just found out today that I was put in the critique group with the Guest of Honor Rachel Caine (check out her Weather Warden series, it's awesome) and the amazing Patrice Sarath (writer of Gordath Wood, also super cool series). This was a huge surprise and I'm elated to have gotten chosen for this group. The only thing that could have been cooler was if I was put in the group with the Editor Guest of Honor. Although I would have been terrified! So I think this worked out for the best. My friend and fellow con-runner Katy Pace will also be in my group. I'm thrilled to know someone and hopefully won't feel as awkward as the last time I did this workshop. I also can't wait to see my friend Phoebe Kitanidis who just had an amazing young adult paranormal called Whisper come out a couple months ago. Anyway this has really kicked me in the pants and I want to start writing/blogging/tweeting more often again. So here's the beginning of many more! I should really go to bed now since it's past 3 in the morning. Lol. I just had a lot of pent up energy tonight. Btw. I just finished Swallowing Darkness by Laurell K. Hamilton and loved it! Really have no desire to read the Anita Blake series but I really like these erotic dark fantasies. Check them out.

The CB, Health Care Scare, and Fears

2010-03-26T10:11:00.002-05:00

No I can't write a blog post about just one single thing. I have ADD. This is what you're gonna get. Enjoy it. :D
The CB is what we employees called Cracker Barrel for short. I no longer count myself among their ranks. I really enjoyed (most of) the people I worked with there but waitressing turned out to be too taxing for me to do what I'm supposed to be doing right now, and that's WRITE! It did give me some interesting experiences and the opportunity to meet some interesting people. I was that waitress who wanted to hear all your gossip or would laugh at your funny stories. But I kept telling people I was a writer and working on a novel, which isn't really true. I am a writer and I want to be working on a novel, however I don't seem to be writing much. Part of that is that I was too effing tired all the time when I wasn't working (which was more than I signed on for). The other part that was holding me back I'll cover later so stay tuned. My manager understood and was pretty nice about it. He even left me eligible for rehire if I wanted to go back. So I'm looking for new jobs again but not in so much desperation.
To interrupt this regularly scheduled ramble about my personal life: some political thoughts. I'm at Chic-Fil-a right now, while I ate my breakfast I read the paper and heard about the recent threats against legislatures both red and blue over the Health Care Reform. First can I say form the POV of someone who may need national health care I support it overall. Everything has flaws when it starts out and they're already ironing out the kinks. But I'm fascinated by the anger some people have inside them. I just don't understand the kind of fuel someone would need to draw a noose and pick a representative's name to put on it or to come up with all the awful things they've said on phone calls. It's just a kind of anger I don't understand. I really need to write about this somehow. It's always boggled my mind. When I took a seminar on violence in the American Renaissance (the literary period right before the Civil War) we talked about it. My professor said that he thinks some people have anger closer to the surface than others. I guess my common sense or inherent laziness usually wins out over such fits of anger. Something to chew on...
So the other part of what's been holding me back from writing is fear. Fear holds me back a lot in life. My old boss once told me my fear was like a really big rock I didn't have a carry around. (He's a very dear friend now.) Phillip is also the person who pulled the blinders from my eyes and confronted my about whether or not I was writing. I'm a perfectionist and I know a lot of other writers have this problem too. That internal editor who looks down her horn-rimmed glasses at you and tells you you're not good enough. Well that bitch can stand aside now. I'm going to confront my fear and challenge myself to write just a little bit everyday. And it can suck! I've always remembered the advice John Scalzi gave us at the '08 ArmadilloCon writing workshop. That you can't be afraid to suck. Because everyone sucks in the beginning and if you keep trying one day you won't suck so bad.

Here's to sucking! Now I'm going to get to work. Until later! You'll be hearing more from me. I know I always say that but I mean it this time!

"Country Fresh"

2010-02-18T23:44:00.002-06:00

I think I want to start using the phrase "country fresh" like "Don't make me go country fresh on you" or "Don't get country fresh with me". Btw "country fresh" is what Cracker Barrel calls what they want their employees to look like. During training we keep making jokes when we do bad things like, "that's probably not country fresh." The group I was training with was pretty goofy. It was fun! I graduated tonight from Cracker Barrel training and can I say that I'm going to be a bad ass server. Tomorrow is our friends and family day. My parents are actually driving up to support me. How cool are they? I'll let you all know how my first day goes tomorrow! Next week I work 4 shifts all started at either 6 am or 5 am. Am I like totally screwed? Yes. I'm going to have to mainline some caffeine before work. But my new friend Lindsey S. and I are wondering who the hell is even open at 4:30 in the freakin' morning? Btw my new friend Lindsey is awesome and I'm so glad I finally found someone else that managed to slip past Cracker Barrel's "country fresh" standards. We're both not gung-ho Aggie and totally not country at all. So we can commiserate! Woot. We talked about tattoos tonight while waiting in line. How awesome? I had to get rid of my tragus piercing to be able to work at Cracker Barrel. So now my only subversive body alteration is gone. My boyfriend even had to cut it out with pliers because it wouldn't come undone. I haven't taken it out in 2 years. Hopefully it doesn't close up. But I think I'm going to eventually get a tattoo somewhere just to spite Cracker Barrel. Ha! Maybe on my calf? My mom would probably flip out. I heard the top of your foot really hurts so I'm not sure I could do that. I wish I was bad ass enough for full sleeves. Oooo. That would be awesome! Also the first thing I'm going to do after I move and don't work at Cracker Barrel is finally get the monroe lip piercing I've been wanting.

Ok but I'm super excited about my new writing project. I'm hoping it can help me get a regular pattern down so I can work on this and start working on my novel finally at the same time! This new project is a screenplay I was asked to work on with an old friend of mine Jeff Turner. Jeff had a huge role in the beginning of my writing career. I'm so honored that he asked my help on his screenplay. He's already got actors interested in helping him sell it after we're finished. So this could be a huge break for me! It's a thriller which is a little out of my comfort zone but a good experiment for me. I'm going to be doing some research this weekend. Any suggestions of good thrillers I should watch? Think a la Sleeping with the Enemy (according to Jeff). I'll give a review of the movies I watch this weekend!

Con, Sickness and my new Job

2010-02-09T17:26:00.003-06:00

AggieCon is over. Thank the celestial beings whoever the hell they are. I've decided not to be as involved next year. I graduated from college and now I feel like I should graduate to helping with bigger conventions. I'll still help out if they ask me, but not as much as this year. Overall it went really well though. We had great feedback, especially about the programming and panels (which is what I did)! One lady even said it was the best AggieCon she'd been to in years. I wish I'd had more time to spend with my writer friends but they understand. Too bad I can't go to ConDFW this weekend. I was going to try to make it. But right now I really to take care of myself. Have some time off.
Because moving to my second topic, I'm SUPER sick. Not as sick today as last night (burning up, couldn't hardly move I ached so bad). I spent over 2 fucking hours in the doctor's office this morning. Don't they understand that most people in the doctor's office are not in the best moods because they're SICK! Geeze. Oh and I went through all that just to find out that I have a virus that will go away on its own. He just gave me a decongestant to treat the symptoms. Bull shit.
Oh and great just as I get sick I need to start my new job. Which is serving food to people! Luckily this week and next week is just training. The doctor said as long as I wasn't running a temperature I wasn't contagious. Hopefully I feel better tomorrow. I also have to go shopping for my loverly "country fresh" uniform. Oxford shirt, dark colored or khaki pants (cotton or cotton/polyester blend that can keep a crease), and I have to get rid of my beautiful manicure too. It's "Give me Moor" btw. We can only have clear nail polish. How lame? Oh well. I'm going to pretend that I'm going under cover. I'll probably end up falling into my old east texas accent too. Lol.

Well that's the update for now. When I get better I'll start writing again and then I'll have more stuff to blog about. *cough, cough* I'm gonna lay down again. Bleh.

Unemployed, Still...

2010-01-22T12:37:00.003-06:00

So I graduated in December. Woo! Go me, right? Then why was I so scared? Oh yeah. That's right I didn't have a job already lined up for me like most people. That whole English majors will work at McDonald's. I'm trying REALLY hard to avoid it but it's looming closer and closer. I interview at the Temp agency next week. *forehead slap* But hey it's something until I can find a more permanent job. I joked that I wanted a SAJ (shitty ass job) after I graduated so that I would have time to concentrate on my writing! But now... I really don't want to end up in that SAJ. I just want a normal everyday job. Like as a receptionist. I sent out 11 resumes today. It's getting pretty depressing. But my boyfriend and I can get a washer and dryer next week! Woot. Clean clothes are definitely a plus.

I'm watching Project Runway re-runs while I send out resumes and work on AggieCon stuff. This weekend we'll be planning all the programming and panels. Yay! My favorite part.

And I know I promise this a lot. But I'm going to keep up with my blog now. Since I'm all out of school and supposed to be on my way to being a writer. So. Watch out world! Lola's on her way. Finally.

Character Problems Solved..I think.

2009-07-30T12:39:00.000-05:00

So I've been having some difficulties getting past the beginning of the Muse novel, which I've rewritten like a million times. First she was too much like me, because the original piece this was inspired by was somewhat biographical. So I tried to make her really different and made her a little too bitchy for what I had in mind. On the advice of Rosemary Clement Moore from her blog about characters, I realized that before I could write from her point of view that I needed to flesh out her personality a bit more. The latest beginning I've written is better, but the "Save the Cat" moment was lost when I changed up the scenes. Plus, the writing wasn't coming out as punchy and snarky as I wanted. Probably because her personality was so wishy-washy. While trying to explain all this to le boyfriend, I summed it up like this: I'm a Piper, and that's what she was like before. When I tried to change her I ended up making her a Pru, BUT I need her to be a Phoebe! After I said that, I was like, oh! That's exactly it. (Because it didn't make much sense to me before either. I just knew something was wrong.) So currently I'm trying to do some character building (on all my characters).

Book Report
Also I finished Rosemary's book Prom Dates From Hell. It was great fun to read and her main character is so pithy. Maggie's attitude/personality really comes out in the style/tone of the writing. Basically, I thought it was brilliant! Go out and order it. I can't wait to read the next one. Also another thing that's great about her series is the age she picked. In this book, Maggie is a senior in High School and in the next two, she's a freshman in college. This is the perfect! age. Because I know I enjoyed even though I'm in college, because high school wasn't too far away that I can't remember what it was like. Plus younger kids the say 12-14 age range are all about growing up and wanting to be the big dogs on campus, then being cool college kids. Genius. Anyway, enough adoration. Lol. How embarrasing. But anyway. I'm going to try to some other reviews of books I've read this summer. That was the most recent. I'll go back and do others!
Here's the link to Rosemary's website!

Mythcon Part III: The End

2009-07-20T11:39:00.000-05:00

I had a wonderful weekend here and met amazing people. Unlike the rest of fandom, the Mythopoeic Society sincerely wants to further the works of the Inklings and fantasy writers/critics everywhere, plus they put in the effort to actually do it. I can definitely identify with the heart and soul they put into all of their work. That's how I do everything in life and most certainly how I approach my career. I could tell from the speech, founder, Glen Goodknight gave last night just how much he loves this society and what it stands for. These people have touched my heart and I have made some very good contacts and new friends while here. This was a great step for my career I think and has really helped me focus on the future. Going into my last semester I'm ready to buckle down and steer myself toward what I want to be doing for the literary community. I am sure that I will stay involved with this society and I know that this opportunity was a blessing. It wasn't just a coincidence that I had written a paper that coincided with the theme, I was meant to come here to see and meet people who are already doing what I want to be doing. It was inspiring. I think I might have inspired a few people too! One fellow water myth scholar who gave a paper right before mine told my mom that she should be very proud of me. Which delights me to no end. I was terrified I would get here and not live up to my own or other people's expectations of myself and my research/analytical skills. But I think instead, I've been galavinized that this is what I'm supposed to be doing.

Philosophical ramble over. We're going to Santa Monica pier, Venice Beach and before that we're going to Craft, Tom Colicchio's restaurant, for lunch! Our plane leaves LAX at 6 and we should arrive back in Texas around 11. Too bad I have a Botany test tomorrow morning and will get no break! Such is the life of an academic. lol.

Mythcon Part II

2009-07-19T23:56:00.000-05:00

So I gave my second presentation this morning. It went much better then Friday's even if there weren't as many people. *shrug* You win some, you lose some. I did get called the Queen of Mermaids tonight at the banquet. So that was pretty sweet. I mean I did enough freakin' research on it. Lol. I have met some amazing people here, gotten lots of good advice on grad school from people who are actually interested in fantasy and respect it. Farah Mendelson is my new literary idol. Lol. I met amazing new writing friends Emily, Shweta, Julia and everyone else!! It was overall a great weekend. Today I got to join mom in some sight seeing. We went down Rodeo Dr and bought one of those maps of the stars' houses off the side of the road. Ha! We drove around and found some of them, took some pictures. I probably won't remember which house was whose but it was fun regardless! I'll put up a few photos when I get them on my computer. I might twitter them too. I'm doing much better about twittering more often. Maybe I can blog more often too. I promise I'll do better about blogging about interesting topics too instead of just boring life stuff. Ok. I gotta go to bed. It may only be 10 here but back home it's midnight and WAY past my bedtime. I'm already an old fuddy duddy.

Mythcon Part I

2009-07-18T11:00:00.000-05:00

I said I was going to be better about updating this thing. And I haven't been! But I'm going to get Sarrah and Lindsey to join the CNN with me and maybe it'll liven up the place. They might think the new layout is a little girly. We might change it up when they start writing here too.

But on to business...

I'm at Mythcon! I've signed my first autograph (it was just the lady who put together the program and she wanted all the presenters to sign, but still I felt special!). And got some good feedback. Obviously, my survey sucked because I'm an English major who tried to do something semi-science-y. But whatevs. I think as a trial it turned out ok and if I ever did this study again I would change it a lot. Oh! In case you didn't know (which you couldn't have unless I told you irl) yesterday I presented the paper I had written about my Linguistics directed study here at Mythcon in Los Angeles. Btw. The weather here=AMAZING! It's sunny but cool and breezy in the shade. I don't want to go back to Texas. My mom's going sight-seeing today while I listen to papers and what not. I also have to work on the paper I'm giving tomorrow. ACK! I might be up all night working on it.

So now I'm going to do some research on the other presenters and then go here GoH Diana Pavlac Glyer's keynote speech. I'll write more later to keep everyone updated!

SoonerCon, so far

2009-06-06T14:54:00.000-05:00

I'm at SoonerCon in Oklahoma. Some highlights of the trip:

1. Sarrah getting hit on TWICE last night.
2. Helping film the upcoming Bubbas of the Apocalypse short. (I'll post the link when it goes up on youtube!)
3. Meeting awesome writers and getting ready for AggieCon.
4. Buying too many awesome books to keep me well occupied in Liberty this summer.
5. Not having to be in Liberty this weekend. :D

And that's all I'll write for now. I'll be posting some thoughts from panels and impromptu discussions later this week. STAY TUNED!

Start of Summer

2009-05-21T20:38:00.000-05:00

So. I moved home. For the first time in three years I'm living at home. So far it's felt like winter vacation. I predict that by the end of June, I'll be ready for school to start again. But in the meantime:
I'm sending off abstracts of papers I've written to Mythcon. (Which reminds me I should email those tonight. Dur.)
I'm substituting at the local elementary and middle schools.
I applied for a summer job at the local library, which I might be REALLY depressed if I don't get it. If I do get it I'll explain why I want it so badly.
I'm gonna keep writing. SoonerCon next weekend! I'll be driving up there with my writing partner, and we'll be meeting our OTHER WRITING PARTNER! A pro-screenwriter!!! Jeff Turner, my buddy and now our writing partner. And he asked us! He liked our movie idea and asked in. Of course we said yes in a heartbeat.
Also my boyfriend has infected me with WoW (World of Warcraft) obession. I currently have a level 13 human 'lock (that's a Warlock if you don't know the terminology, I'm just learning it myself), a level 4 tauren hunter, and a level 7 undead rogue. Apparently this obession with creating chracters is called Alt fever. lol. I'm still on the trial account but I think this weekend we're gonna upgrade me! Sah-weet. Then I can make a dranei and a blood elf when I get the Burning Crusade expansion, also I can be a jewelcrafter. Ok, I'm finished. Sorry! It's a disease this game is!!!

And this weekend I'm meeting the bf's parents. I'm a little nervous. But parents usually like me. I just really miss my bf. We'd only been dating for a month and a half or so before I had to move down here. Long distance sucks. But we'll manage! Ok. Enough personal stuff. Here are my current obessions:

Kaboodle.com
Polyvore.com
Damsel (blog)
Redecorating Middle-Earth in Early Lovecraft (blog)
Whatever Martha! (TV show I'll be talking about A LOT MORE! It's amazing.)

That's it for now! Next blog, upcoming movies I want to see.

X-men Origins, or I WANT MORE RYAN REYNOLDS!

2009-05-01T13:57:00.000-05:00

The scene it briefly shows in the above clip where he cuts a bullet in half, WAS AWESOME! After it was over everybody in the theater cheered and I yelled, "Fuck yeah!" really loud. It was the highlight of the movie for me. Well... maybe not the highlight, that would have to be seeing my FAVORITE X-men character, FINALLY in a movie. Here's......

GAMBIT!!

Damn. I couldn't find his X-men origins character spotlight like Wade's above. So instead you get this:

Totally made the movie for me. The Wolverine parts got kinda slow sometimes but Gambit totally made up for it. I was sad that Wade Wilson wasn't in the movie more. Overall, definitely bad ass and if you like super hero movies it's worth seeing just for the few amazing fight scenes.

If this semester is ever over...

2009-04-30T13:41:00.000-05:00

I will celebrate by finally getting my lip pierced. The past few days have been PURE HELL and my lovely boyfriend has been the only thing keeping me from falling apart. Also frequently being the object of distraction, but I'll forgive him for driving me around while sleep deprived, making sure I ate at least 2 meals a day and that I didn't have a full blown panic attack, although I came very close last night. Not a good week. But right now I am finishing (well about to be finishing after I write this) a paper and then I'll have another one to write by next week... if I get the extension I asked for. We'll see.

So, news on the home front:
New look for blog. Not sure how much I like it. The other one was more simple... I might change it again soon.
I was chosen to be the Programming Director for AggieCon 41!!! Woot! I've already got a huge spreadsheet of ideas going and so far the committee is looking like this will be the best AggieCon ever! I want us to do a Zombie theme. It would be AWESOME! Zombies are very in right now. I'm sure you'll hear more about AggieCon in the coming months. Which leads to...
This summer I'm going to be doing a huge convention marathon trying to make relations with regional guests and convince them AggieCon will be worth their time again. Plus getting ideas for programming and like last summer, I'll be applying to some writing workshops as well. So far on the line up for sure are Akon, ApolloCon and ArmadilloCon. I'm considering Fourth Street Convention, FiestaCon and ConQuest as well but there's a bit more traveling involved in those so we'll see which ones pan out.
Also! Not really related to AggieCon specifically, except that I'll probably get ideas for programming while I'm there, is that I'm submitting two abstracts for MythCon this summer. So if chosen I could go to LA to present a paper I've written! How cool would that be? Which reminds me I need to get back to my paper asap.

Oh sad news! Jenny Rappaport the literary agent of my dreams I wrote about previously got accepted to Odyssey. If only I had applied I could have met her! This sounds so silly but I'm very sure that we would get along great. Curse the fact that I'm graduating in December and really need to concentrate on applying to grad school. I'll meet her another way if it's meant to be. :/

Other than all that I'm just REALLY ready for the semester to be over. I'm moving home this summer, going to community college and hopefully working at the city library. I'm actually really excited about the prospect of working at the city library. It would be a childhood dream come true! I spent so many hours of my young child life in that library reading, good memories. Plus I've ALWAYS had a secret fantasy of being an awesome librarian. Now I can live it out!

For Future Reference

2009-04-20T10:43:00.000-05:00

I will return soon. This summer I plan to keep up better with this blog. Especially since I'll be working on a screenplay and my novel. But at the moment school has again taken over. I have an exam and an essay due tomorrow (the exam was actually due last week but I'm taking late points for it). Then Thursday I have a research paper due that I already got an extension on, but I'm about to ask for another extension until next Tuesday. But next Thursday I have another research paper due. And I'll have another exam due soon too... Fml, right?

In the mean time, go read The Looking Glass Wars. It's decent. Not brilliant, but entertaining and I can actually pay attention during the fight scenes which is really saying something. <- Exact reason I could never write epic fantasy, I hate fight scenes. 'One lunges, the other parries... blah blah blah.' I just skip to find out who won. I know lame right?

But back to work. Also you should listen to Queens of the Stone Age, as I am right now. It has the most amazing calming effect on me. It's bizarre. But I'm as gentle and relaxed as a kitten when it's on.

Spring Break is here, so is Mono

2009-03-13T11:27:00.000-05:00

So I have mono and it sucks horribly. I slept 12 hours last night. I didn't even want to. Not to mention that yesterday I had to take a nap because after my morning classes I went all crazy and cried. I was really worried about my trip to Washington D.C. to see my best friend because I've been planning it since CHRISTMAS!!! and now I've had to push it back to next weekend instead. But I feel really bad I cost my mom 300-something to change my ticket. She was really worried about me leaving today and not having any fun because I'm so sick. Boo to the universe that always makes me sick. Bleh. I should be packing to go home right now but instead I'm making playlists for the ride home and writing this blog entry. I promised I would keep this more updated.

But Spring Break means.... WRITING TIME!!! Hopefully I can at least revamp my Merlin story for the Gordone Award. I don't think that new creative nonfiction piece is going to get written... I have this really old piece from high school actually that I could rewrite into something better... Now that I think of it. It was our senior english final project. He never told us we were writing creative nonfiction but it totally was. Anyway I'm going to get back to making some playlists. Have a good spring break! I'll keep you updated on the progress of those stories.

AH!! This has totally galvanized me.

2009-03-02T12:53:00.000-06:00

I already know how my dream agent is, her name is Jenny Rappaport and I've been following her blog Lit Soup (see sidebar). Well... following as in infrequently reading the most frequent post. I'm a really bad blog follower. Feministing.com is probably the one I stay most current on and I only check it every couple of weeks. That's besides the point! Today I checked her blog and look at this post!!!!

I'll quote the things that are what got me so excited and explain why.

"I want the next John Green. By which I mean, I want funny, poignant books about intelligent teenagers. Mainstream YA novels, obviously. But I want to read books about teenagers like me, in high school. I don't want to read about the always popular bitchy sluts, because you know what? I wasn't a popular bitchy slut, and that type of story never has and never will appeal to me as a reader. I know there's a market out there for it, but I am not the right agent for the Gossip Girls series, unless *your* Gossip Girls series is written so well that I fall instantly in love with your writing. (Never say never.)" I have a YA in the back of my mind about a girl transported to a medieval indie music inspired world where all of her really random skills somehow make her the perfect candidate to save the kingdom. (Yes this is cliche' in YA but I won't do it super cliche' like. If you know my writing at all you know I like to play on archetypes and I think I do it pretty well.) She is much like me in high school. So I have a story idea that falls into this category.

"I want an epic fantasy novel that thinks outside the box. This can be done in a number of ways, but the most obvious one is not to do a direct rip-off of Robert Jordan or George R. R. Martin. You don't need an innocent farmboy saving the world to have a wonderful epic fantasy novel. Epic fantasies can have different ideas and yet be incredibly good. I want you to write me one that's *different*. One recent epic fantasy that I adored was THE NAME OF THE WIND by Patrick Rothfuss, which has plenty of standard fantasy tropes, but totally twists them on their head, especially with his innovative narrative structure. Stories within stories within stories. I want your epic fantasy novel to completely surprise me and overwhelm me and make me believe in the power of the epic fantasy novel to sweep me out of my everyday world. Can you write me one? =)" Wow. Sounds like my future tour de force world politics epic fantasy might be right up her alley. Sometimes also referred to as Xavier world since I still haven't decided if it'll be an alternate universe or not. Just wait there's more...

"I want an urban fantasy. I don't have enough urban fantasies on my list, and I'd like one. Perhaps it would be better to say I want a contemporary fantasy. It doesn't necessarily need vampires or werewolves, because I think those are somewhat played out now." *Cough* Muse novel anyone? A very contemporary urban fantasy novel that isn't about vampires or werewolves. Oh and I'm still not finished.

"I don't have enough romance, period. I want witty contemporary romances like Jennifer Crusie, who I adore. I want sexy historical romances. I want paranormal romances that make me love the characters and the worldbuilding behind them." The Muse novel could totally go paranormal romance too. It's on that thin line between Urban Fantasy and Paranormal Romance. I would just need to add a few sex scenes which I think I'm totally capable of and I can already think of where they would fit in the plot. Oh and my writing is SO witty. Not trying to be arrogant. But I think that's one of the strongest parts of my writing. Oh an the Amazon story could totally fall under this too! She might also like the Lewis and Clark story which falls somewhere between Chic Lit, Historical Fiction, and Romance.

"I would love to see a slipstream novel. There are very few out there. I think there could be more. Show me what you've got." and...
"I'm still looking for a great historical fiction novel to fall in love with. Haven't found it yet. Keep sending more." Making of the Treaty anyone? Hells yes. Zebulon Pike? Check.

and finally:
"Because this is a baker's dozen list! Let's throw out a random book description, and see if anyone can write it for me: I want a superhero novel--give me your version of Dr. Horrible in book form with your own original villians and superheroes and plot. Be creative. =)" the Xavier story certainly falls under this category since it's slightly x-men esque although that's not what I originally based it on, it's been pointed out to me multiple times the similarities. My favorite superpower'd character to create: probability manipulation. I had a character named Trix aka Fortune on a super hero rpg once I would love to write her into the Xavier universe somehow.

Can anyone else imagine how perfect this agent is for me? Or actually how perfect I am for this agent. ;) She just doesn't know it yet. Hopefully by the end of this year I'll be querying her with the Muse novel and I have a feeling if it all works out in my favor she'll love being my agent for everything else I write too. It would be a brilliant match because her interests so perfectly match all of my very eclectic future body of work. *sigh* I'm in literary agent love.

Future Prospects

2009-03-02T12:31:00.000-06:00

I'm skipping applying for the Clarion workshops. I already decided this over the break. I don't want to write short stories (or at least not primarily, they might crop up over the course of my career) and that's what that workshop is geared toward. I know they say you can send a chapter for Clarion West but they seem to discourage it. Anyway but here are my future writing plans for this year:

1. Apply for the Gordone Award in the English Dept. I'm submitting two manuscripts. One creative nonfiction piece as of now still unwritten (lol) and I'm revamping Merlin for this specific purpose to enter in the fiction category.
2. Apply for Odyssey. It seems more novel friendly and is specifically geared toward fantasy writers. Also their 09 writer in residence writes books a lot like me. Maybe she'll be my friend. (Gosh I sound like a second grader.) I'm going to send Merlin or the first chapter of the Muse novel for my application. Most likely Merlin since it'll already be written. I want to work on the Muse novel while I'm there though and if I get accepted I'm going to send the first chapter as my second submission. (If you get accepted they want another short piece before you go to the workshop.)
3. Apply for Viable Paradise, even though I'll miss a week of school. Since I'm only gonna have to take 9 hours or so to finish I don't think it'll be too big of a deal. Really awesome writers are also going to be the instructor for this. I'm definitely sending the first few chapters of the Muse novel for this.

I think if I can at least work toward all of these things by next fall when I graduate I'll be well on my way to having a manuscript to send out and really be in my stride as a writer. Ready to move where ever, become a dog walker and/or receptionist to pay rent and start my life as a semi-respectable writer.
These are my immediate future plans. I felt like writing them down. I'm going to try and keep up with this blog more often. (I know I say that a lot.)

My Hero

2009-02-05T22:04:00.000-06:00

I'm Just Not That Into Myself

2009-01-30T15:11:00.000-06:00

So... first let me say how much I've been looking forward to the movie based on the brilliant book He's Just Not That Into You. It was a very liberating book and not negative towards women at all. It was actually very empowering when I read it. Their main message is that basically "you, the super fox reading this book, are worth asking out" and that we need to stop making excuses for guys who just aren't that into us. That we should value ourselves more and refuse to date guys who aren't going to treat us like the awesome, beautiful and talented women that we are. I was kind of irked when Jennifer Aniston said she wished the film was titled She's Just Not That Into You, that it would have made it more empowering. Obviously she hasn't read the book, which upsets me. Ridiculous these celebrities/actresses. *sigh*

Anyway rereading parts of that book in anticipation of the movie got my mind moving. Not about relationships because I'm about to graduate and move somewhere and I'm not a place in my life to date anyone. What I wanted to write about is that maybe I'm Just Not That Into Myself right now. I makes excuses for my behavior and am really not living up to the person I want to be. I let my school work and regular work go by the wayside and then justify it later so I don't feel bad. I end up feeling guilty anyway. I'm letting myself down in life and I'm fed up with being stuck in the same horrible patterns. But I think it's good news that I've realized this. The only person holding me back, is me. Well I think realizing all of this will help me. This post sounds like I'm just downing myself but really I just needed a Come to Jesus meeting with myself and this is it.

In similar news today I realized I haven't skipped a single class yet. I was late to one the other day but I forced myself to go anyway. How awesome?! Believe me this is a feat for me. I really want to keep it up throughout the semester. Really liking my classes helps I think. And knowing that they're all Tuesday/Thursday classes therefore if I missed one it would be really important helps too.

From here on out, I vow to stop making excuses for myself and strive my hardest to accomplish the things I set out to do. Let's see if I can hold myself to it.

Here's the trailer for that movie btw:

Ginnifer Goodwin, Drew Barrymore, Justin Long, and Leonardo Nam are who I'm excited about seeing. IMDB the last guy! He was in The Perfect Score and Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. I think he is a hilarious and adorable Asian man. lol. I want to see him in more! He was SO funny in the Perfect Score. Really made the whole movie for me. *shrug* Ok I'm going to go work out.

Oh! And I almost forgot...

2009-01-23T15:36:00.000-06:00

Today marks the one year anniversary of my first steps as a writer. This time exactly last semester one Karyn Smith, lecturer, starting teaching me that I didn't have to wait to call myself a writer.

This is for you Karyn! One day when I'm finally published you'll be in the thanks. Otherwise I never would have published anything other than papers about Wainscot Worlds in Popular Fantasy until I was 40 and realized how unfulfilled my life was. Thanks for taking me under your wing and making me feel more special than the other kids in the class. (Other than Sarrah who is now one of my best friends.) Your endless goading and expert advice guided me toward taking the years off to pursue fiction that will probably save my sanity. Otherwise I would have gone straight into whatever second rate grad school that would take me instead of waiting out for what I really want. To Karyn, who was once my professor and mentor and I hope will always be my friend. When I'm famous I'll invite you to my birthday party. :D Haha.

S' been awhile.

2009-01-23T15:19:00.000-06:00

So I'm gonna try to keep this up. Again... I know, I know. I've made this promise to my non existent readers before. Well I'm gonna try to keep it this time. A lot has happened since that angst-ridden post last Nov. Haha. I decided to give up dreaming about Clarion to work on my novel instead. I'm graduating in December now instead of the May or August I was hoping for. Sad day, I know. But I'm looking to try and study abroad this summer and next fall I'll only have to take like 2 classes. Which means lotsa writing time and hoping shopping out a manuscript to potential agents. We'll see how that goes. I think I can have a pretty good draft of the muse novel by then.

Why did I decide against Clarion you ask?
Well... I don't want to write short stories. Or at least not really fantasy short stories. All my short stories are historical fiction type stuff. Or comedic. Every time I sat down over the break to work on stories they evolved into stuff more suited to a novel and I couldn't get my muse novel off my brain. So obviously my brain knows something I don't and is telling me to get my ass in gear on this muse novel. And that's what I'm gonna do.

I'm gonna try to keep up with this and my treadmill journal better. Since maybe one day I'll have readers who'll want to read my random musings. Musings reminds me I need a catchy puntastic title for the muse novel. What about... Not A-Mused, nope. Musing and Using? Nope. Damn it. Oh well it'll come to me eventually. They always do.

Also! Merlin is going to become a novel. As is Making of the Treaty (see that's a catchy title) and the Amazon story... nope no catchy title for that one yet. But the main character's name is Aggy (Agape) and she's part of the Muse universe. Awesome right? That's what I have on the back burners right now. Since I'm taking two writing intensive classes and a history class with a professor that would love to rape all of us when we turn in our essays. However I think he'll love my equally cynical view of history and American society. Oh right and that directed studies that will have me buried up to my eyes in library books. lol. Nope I'm not complaining. I like all of these classes so far and I'll MAKE IT WORK! In the wise words of Tim Gun.

Frustrated with school...

2008-11-12T17:28:00.000-06:00

I want to work on my writing. I loved the stuff I wrote last week. It was clever and... well shitty in general but there were some nuggets in there. *sigh* Instead I'm procrastinating a 12 page paper that I'm sure my asshole professor will probably tear apart. RAWR!!! I'm so ready to be out of here and have time to write.

... That's all I'm just venting. Btw my NaNoWriMo novel's synopsis is this:

Screenwriter has rent due, has to turn back on her vow not to write anymore pornos to get some quick cash. Starts out with a passionate and somewhat intriguing script about the "real" lewis and clark expedition. However she uncovers what might be true and Meriwether Lewis' life inspiring her to write her tour de force a dramady instead.

I like it so far. :D It has potential. Fun, light, chick lit probably.

Listening to "One Love"

2008-11-05T12:47:00.000-06:00

although that's not how I'm feeling right now.

At A&M today I'm sincerely afraid for my personal safety wearing my Obama shirt. I've already gotten dirty looks from people. And because of the bull shit I've seen on facebook, from people I actually know, I'm afraid of being hurt and my thoughts about how uneducated a lot of America still is are confirmed. Let's get some things straight:

Obama is not a socialist. We have a socialist party, they had a candidate, it was not Obama.
America will not become socialist. For many reasons I don't feel like expanding on again.
However let's point out such policies as Social Security, taxes, and corporate regulation. All of which are socialist. We already have socialist policies.
And this could get me beat up at A&M (before I would be joking, now I'm not sure) but a little more socialism wouldn't hurt us.
Also the second amendment does not apply to us today. It is not about personal gun use. Besides the fact that Obama would have to change the constitution to change that, Oh! and if you look it up he's already said he didn't want to.

I'm so fed up with violent and ignorant people who can't get educated on the issues and talk out their ass. End of rant.

In other news. WOOT! We have a black president. I'm super excited about it. What I'm more excited about, BUSH IS NOW OFFICIALLY A LAME DUCK! Thank the stars.
I'm also really looking forward to seeing how Michelle Obama does as first lady. We haven't had a really strong first lady affect policy since Eleanor Roosevelt. I hope she steps up and I think she will.

Bob Marley is calming me down right now.

Ish the weekend...

2008-10-25T23:49:00.000-05:00

And I'm lame. But whatevs. I have a chemistry test monday morning I still haven't studied for. Bad news that is. I'm watching Sideways right now. It's pretty good. I like Paul Giamatti in shitty down and out kind a guy roles. It has good quotes.

"Thumbprint on the glass of a skyscraper."

and when he talks about why he likes Pinot and the way Mia talks about wine. Wine is on my list of things that I wish I were an expert on. lol. Anyway I'm reworking the plot of the novel. Adding more Andy and only the short abstract paragraph starters for each chapter are going to be first person. I was having a hard time writing in first person anyway. Anyway. Look it's amazing my blog entries are getting shorter! Aren't you glad?

lol. Go vote.

2008-10-20T20:27:00.000-05:00

His name is Obama. If he dies our country won't go to hell in a hand basket. Can't say that much for the republican ticket. I really don't mind McCain that much, he's not my fav, but I will abjure this country and emigrate if he happens to die and Palin is the first female president. What an insult to women everywhere.

Oh, oh and I found this too. lol. Enjoy. I'm in an odd mood. Please excuse me if I offended anyone.

NanoWrimo

2008-10-18T16:03:00.000-05:00

So I signed up for National Novel Writing Month. I was going to write about circus people but now I'm not so sure. Maybe I'll do my YA alternate universe... Who knows yet? I just know I need something to get my ass in gear and this seems like it'll help my work ethic.

In other news I'm now addicted to Carnivale. I hate when I get really into shows that aren't on anymore. Argh. I'm home for the fair. Going to the rodeo tonight to find out who won Queen this year. That's all. Isn't that exciting? Not a rambly blog post for once. It's probably because I'm watching episodes of Carnivale at the same time.

A Character Sketch

2008-10-13T22:48:00.000-05:00

Fred Davis,

Campaign Advisor (Aka Creative Director) for McPalin

"What did she just do? Why is she looking directly in the camera? Did she just fucking wink? She just winked. Oh god. At least she's keeping up with the generalized bull shit we've fed her instead of going off into lala land. Oh shit. She did it again. I'm having a brain aneurysm. Someone shoot me. I'm working with a monkey, a trained monkey and a poorly trained one at that. Obviously."

The end. For now. I might have more thoughts from my fictional Fred Davis. I really did read him being referred to as the creative director, interesting turn of phrase.

I just figured that their pr team was ready to hang themselves when she started winking at the camera. If it was me I would be ready to rip off someone's head, maybe an intern would suffice.

Word of the Day

2008-10-12T21:19:00.000-05:00

euphonious. Go look it up. That's all I got for today because I'm WAY swamped with like 5 major projects (a test, a paper, a journal, etc.) all due on Tuesday. So I'm trying to spread it out over today and tomorrow. Bleh. I'll be back Wednesday.

Oh and Congrats to Phoebe on getting a two-book deal from Harper Collins! I'm really proud of her.

Wow. That's great.

2008-10-11T09:33:00.000-05:00

I just heard the Republican ticket refered to as McPalin. HA! Great. And since all my posts are super rambly I'm going to end this one here. I just thought McPalin was worth lightening your day too.

Ifa, the Yoruba form of divination

2008-10-10T11:34:00.000-05:00

We had a babalawo (shaman) of Ifa come and speak to our Anthropology class. It was pretty damn sweet. I think I said those exact words when we left class. Their philosophy is very interesting. One thing in particular hit home with me. He drew a diagram like this:

spiritual

past............................future

secular

(I had to put the ...'s in the middle so the diagram would look right. Stupid Blogger took out my formatting.)
and he drew circles from the top to bottom and from right to left. So it creates a sphere. Their philosophy is that you need to try to stay balanced in the middle. I realized while he was talking about this that my problem is that I'm too much focused on the future and not on the present in the middle like I need to be. I'm so focused on the future that I'm not getting things done now. I think I'm ok balancing the spiritual and the secular. It's a very interesting culture Yoruba. Makes me want to go to Africa and hang out with these awesome people. That is all.

Woot for time to write

2008-10-08T22:14:00.003-05:00

Should I be studying instead? Probably. But at least I'm being productive in some way.

1. 10-8-08, 10:20 pm
2. I'm going to write for an hour or so.
3. I need to work on the dialogue. Make it punchier. I dunno all around I need to flesh out what I have so far.
4. Well shit. I dunno I didn't do all that much other than probably over edit the stuff I'd already written. I need to just work on getting more written and go back and edit later. I'm actually having a hard time writing in first person. Maybe I should work on that. And I think my verb tenses are WAY off but I'm not sure how to fix it. UGH!!!! I feel like everything I'm writing is crap and WAY basic. Not that it all has to be super duper wordy but I feel... like it's crap. I dunno.
5. I'm going to write tomorrow night around the same time. I should be back from our intramural game so I'll write then. BAH!

If I could graduate tomorrow

2008-10-08T10:29:00.000-05:00

I would in a second. I'm SO tired of school. I need to get past this senioritis so I can finish the year with flying colors. It's so sad that I don't have the 4.0 I could because I'm a combination of ADD and Super Avoider of Life and I'd Rather Sleep Than Finish My Midterm Due Today. Gah. I don't know what is wrong with me.

Ok. No more whining. Sorry.

Basically I need to get to work on my Linguistics Midterm. And I have a chemistry lab exam tonight. Not cool. Oh and I haven't finished my homework. FUCK! I'm whining again.

Someone want to cheer me up? Because I'm going to stop typing here so it doesn't turn into another whine fest. Maybe I should go hang out with someone time and have a wine fest after my test. Now that sounds like a plan.

"Open the door, Bitch!"

2008-10-06T16:54:00.000-05:00

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist:

Was amazing! I mean it would be funny just with the Nick, Norah, Tris triangle by itself but through in the crazy drunk best friend running around town and the three flamers trying to play matchmaker... Perfect. I saw it two nights in a row and I'm seriously considering seeing it again. This is my new favorite movie. Love, love, love. I would recommend it to anyone. And great jokes. I think it's better than any Jude Apatow film I've seen and I'm a fan of Apatow. Kat Dennings and Michael Cera are endearing awkward the whole film and in the end all the jerks get what's coming to them. I seriously want to see it again. lol. Plus the music in it is awesome. I want to buy the soundtrack. I might do it right now actually.

In other news, I got some writing done last night. Phoebe and I are back in contact! I got a GPS for my birthday and am already planning a road trip for this christmas break. That is all. I'm at work right now. Two tests this week and a paper due next week. Yuck.

OH MY GAWD!!!

2008-10-05T23:40:00.003-05:00

Finally. I've forced myself to write. Well I'm about to be. First entry in WAY too long. I'm going to try to be better about this. My goal this week is 3 hours. (Not including tonight. Tonight is going towards last week, which also had a goal of 3 hours that I think I missed the bus on.)

1. 10-5-08, 11:42 pm
2. I'm going to write for an hour. Then take a break. Maybe write some more depending on how it's going.
3. I've had the first chapter outlined for quite a while. I'm going to try to make progress on writing it now. Phoebe's asking me for pages and I want some good stuff to send her.
4. Woot! I made it to an hour exactly and I think I've written all the shit I can for now. Not all of it was too bad though. I dunno... we'll have to see. Really right now I just need to get words down on a page, but I also need to be working on research papers. Bleh.
5. I'm going to try and write again tomorrow night around this time. Hopefully I can get all my other homework and stuff done before then. I'm ready for this semester to be OVER! Ugh.

This week has been a mixed bag so far.

2008-10-02T10:34:00.000-05:00

My shit is more together but I didn't go to all my classes. lol. I'm sick again though and that's my excuse. Plus yesterday was my birthday. I bought a beer at lunch and the guy didn't even card me. Which was lame. My friend Amanda took me out to dinner (after my three hour long Chemistry lab, stab me in the eye please) for margaritas which was fun. For some reason I do feel more grown up. I've passed over that threshold and now I'm truly an adult who is about to leave home and make her own way in the world. Weird. But anyway. Today I'm going to get some writing done. WOOT! I've had the first chapter outlined forever. And I've had the first part of it written since last april but I'll probably rewrite it so I'll put a piece of it here for you. A little teaser.

I have tropical fish. They’re pretty to look at and they don’t talk back. Vibrant hues of blue, violet and green, a classic black and white with a hint of gold, an orange with fiery red flecks; they love me because I feed them. There’s nothing complex about our relationship. Their tank is huge, covering a whole wall of my loft’s living room. They're always in the mood for whatever record I happen to put on. Therefore have developed the same taste in music. They don’t care if I have secrets because even if I told them all the intimate details they’d forget it in about two point five seconds. Having a secret life doesn’t lend itself to great relationships.
-

Whadda ya think? :D
And now I'm gong to be late for English. Damn. Peace out!

I'm not doing so great...

2008-09-29T05:18:00.000-05:00

keeping up with my classes. I'm under a lot less stress with less to do but herein lies the bane of my existence. When I have a lot to do I get more done but with way more stress and then I end up going to pieces like I did a little over a week ago. So I quit doing so much prioritizing better however I end up using all the new time I've created poorly. Damn it. I need someone other than this blog to complain to. I bet other writers don't whine this much on their blogs. Oh well. It's an integral part of my personality (sadly) so readers should learn to find it endearing. I don't do it excessively but it's part of my coping mechanism. Anyway. I also had plenty of time to write this weekend and didn't. Fuck. I need to get my shit together. Together is my shit getting together week whereas last week was my dicking around and doing nothing week. I'm going to go to all my classes, catch up on my school work and write for at least three hours. No more screwing around. Well maybe just a little bit because my birthday is this week but most of that kind of screwing around will occur this weekend when I'm back in Houston.

Just today and tomorrow until I'm 21!!!! I should read up on wine selection. I like mostly rieslings or sweeter white wines OR fruitier red wines. lol. Now I just need to figure out which are which at the store. Woot!

Other people's vacation pictures...

2008-09-25T22:54:00.000-05:00

are really the worst. Especially when I hear all about people who did study abroad over the summer or my sorority sister who's family has a chateau in Paris so she took classes there. I'm really stinking tired of hearing about other people's fabulous trips. I'm about to be 21 and I've realized that I haven't been anywhere really. *Sigh* I think my caffeine headache is making me irritable. I should go to bed early, I also need to quit skipping classes. Very bad. This weekend I'm going to get a lot of writing done. Fiction as well as getting started on my research papers and! the application I'm working on for a public policy internship in Austin next semester. I think it would be fun plus get me the hell out of college station.

I had a really awesome dream the other night that would be a great idea for a YA series I think. I actually remembered to write it down when I woke up too. Haha. I've never done that before. I even drew a picture of something I remembered seeing the dream that I thought was cool. It was very interesting. Have you ever written about something you saw in a dream?
(I have a feeling this question will be rhetorical. But I'm pretending like I'm already an author and people think the things I have to say are interesting. I'm practicing blogging and promoting myself. lol. PR campaigns can never be started too early I think.)

It's been awhile I've realized...

2008-09-25T15:02:00.000-05:00

since I've actually sat down and written something. I need to get with this. Especially if I'm trying to finish my novel by next year so I can shop it out to agents... School and other stuff just takes up so much time and energy that I think about writing all the time and never get anything done. I need to start trying to write a certain number of hours a week. I can do it. Just three maybe. Three hours a week isn't bad right? And it's more productive than I have been. Saturday is going to be a big writing day too. Since I have nothing better to do. lol. Aren't I sad and pathetic? Not really I could care less. I think I might do an internship in Austin next semester. A public policy one. It will be really interesting though to see who wins the presidential election. I was thinking about going to D.C. but I realized that Austin will be perfect since that's where my novel is set. If I was living there... perfection. I'm sure I'd have free time to write and stuff too. Plus I'd be immersed in the setting with new ideas around me all the time! Maybe I'll have started the second one by then!

Ok I met this really awesome writer at ArmadilloCon (sorry rapid subject change, keep up) named Phoebe Kitanidis and we became pretty good friends. However I have managed to lose her email address and all other avenues of getting in contact with her have failed. If anyone has ideas for how I can contact her they would be greatly appreciated.

Life is settling down...

2008-09-24T09:26:00.000-05:00

It only took two months but finally I feel like I can breath. Well at least a few sips of sweet sweet Oxygen (and whatever the hell else we've plugged up the ozone with) and at least once a day. Before I was definitely drowning in everything I had going on. Not cool. But when I went all to pieces last week I learned some things:

1. I wasn't being appreciated at the radio station. So I quit. It wasn't worth it anymore. I can listen to music on my own and the only friend I had there I see all the time anyway.
2. I have the most amazing boss in the world. I tried to quit and he wouldn't let me. Now I'm still on the payroll and he told me to just come in whenever I get everything figured out. And he's emailed to check on me already this week. I got lucky working for this dude. I hope my next boss is as awesome.
and
3. That yet again I can't do everything. I tend to come up against this a lot. I'm just an overachiever. I don't try to be. I just have very diverse (and numerous) interests which I like to be involved in, and when I'm involved in something I really put all my talents and efforts into it. But I also have a problem prioritizing so I try to do it all instead of decide what's most important. So I have breakdowns like last week and figure it out all at once. lol. At least I don't let it go as far as I did my freshman year in college.

ONE WEEK EXACTLY UNTIL I'M 21!!!!!
Very exciting.
Oh and my parents got power back finally. The worst part of the storm went like right over them. The damage was worse than Rita and I was there during Rita. We didn't evacuate. Gotta be hardcore, to live hardcore. That's a song...

Oh and all the exercises I do for Writer's Guild I'm going to start posting on here. Just for funsies!

Short stories vs. Novels

2008-09-15T08:35:00.000-05:00

I think they're like relationships. Which makes sense why I keep being told I'm better at novels. I'm a commitment kind of person, which is why I don't date casually usually equaling at all. (I promise I don't intend for these things to get all emo and personal. It just happens.) Short story are like a one night stand gratifying at the time and then you can move on to something else. To quote Blair from Gossip Girl like a Kleenex that you use once then throw away. I feel like the process of writing a novel is a lot like an involved relationship. Always trying to make the other person change to fit what you have in mind then when you let go it either works itself out or you drift apart with unfinished business. And it can be like that boyfriend that you finally had to dump because no matter how much you loved him, you didn't like him anymore and he didn't make you happy but he's always there nagging in your mind, maybe if you just picked it up again it would work this time. But that's a story that you lost interest in for a reason.

lol. I think one day when I actually have credentials to be writing a book about writing I'm going to do a nonfiction romance writing manual. Giving writing and relationship advice at the same time. How fun? Don't steal my idea! I'm looking on amazon to see if such a hybrid exists. So far I've found a book about being a mother and a writer, also a book about creative writing if you've been in an abusive relationship, I think some stories can be abusive but it's only paper right? You should just lock it in a drawer. Especially if it's afraid of the dark. Why men marry bitches, oh but that's not about writing. It just looked interesting. Although I've not quite jumped off that particular cliff yet where all your friends are getting married and you're still not. I'm getting close to it though tis the season for engagements. I'm sure I'll still be that bitter, cynical single person just at a wedding so my black and foul outlook on love will cloud such a happy event therefore starting my ploy for world power. Oh oh. When God Writes Your Love Story. Oh but there only God gets to do the writing. It's not about writing too. The guide to Romance Writing was as close as I came literally to my chosen future book topic. The God writing your love story one the closest metaphorically. I think I've found something!

What do you think? Does this sound interesting? Would writers read it, would lovers read it and want to write? Or at least still get something out of it. I guess writers who need relationship advice is a small audience to write to. We'll see. I need those credentials first so yeah... back to the grindstone!
Oh! and writer's guild has 15 participants now. The number went up with people who couldn't make it last week but want to come this week. WOOT! And none of the 23 people on my mailing list have asked to be taken off yet so maybe they'll be enticed to start going to. Gotta run!

Everything works out...

2008-09-14T19:15:00.000-05:00

So sometimes my life and the way it winds along this very determined yet sporadic path amazes me. It all just seems to work out perfectly somehow. It's a much longer story than I care to tell right now but to find out that Seattle has the largest community of Icelandic people was super cool. Because I've been thinking about spending a couple year in Iceland doing a masters in comparative literature. Except that I have to speak and understand Icelandic to do so, since I'm taking my writing year in Seattle I looked up to see if I would be able to find anyone to practice with and! lo and behold it looks like I'll definitely be able to. How cool? There's this free online Icelandic course that gets you up through intermediate so I can do that in between writing and learning whatever other language I was going to add during my year off. I still can't decide between Italian or German or French. Although I prefer them in that order... Or maybe Greek! But I'm not sure which one would be the most useful. Obviously Icelandic will only be useful while I'm over there and as a party trick but it will be worth it. The program they have for comparative lit is exactly what I wish I could find in the states. With electives on Horror Literature and Hard Boil Fiction, all genre literature, I'd be in heaven!

Btw. I think I'm going to Seattle over spring break to look for a place to live, maybe a job, plus in general being a tourist since when I move there I won't have time for all that fun stuff. Is 2 months too early to be looking for a job? We'll have to see.

Good news/Bad news

2008-09-12T09:36:00.000-05:00

I need to update this dealy bob more. Dealy bob? Seriously? *shakes head* It's ok. It's my native dialect and not wrong/incorrect just different. lol. My linguistics class has started to influence my speaking all the time now. It's a very interesting class though. Ok here it is...

Good news: I had 11 writers come to the first craft discussion of Writers Guild. So including myself that's 12 which makes 3 groups of 4 for workshops. Woot. They were all really neat people and I'm super excited about it. Next week we're talking about imagery. And I already have what I'm going to say all outlined out. I'm going to be an awesome professor.

Bad news: My doctor told me this morning that I have a viral infection and it takes 7-10 days to get over it. Boo. I was super sick all day yesterday. I HATE being sick. At least I don't have strep throat like I thought.

Good news: Only 18 more days until I'm 21. Double WOOT! But that leads me to...

Bad news: I found out recently I can't go to FenCon and have my first legal drink. :/ Sad day. I have sorority stuff that weekend. The kind that I can't get out of like I did to be able to go to ArmadilloCon. When's the next con after FenCon? I'll have to look it up.

That's all for now. This weekend I really need to get caught up on my journal for my English class. And I need to order my books for that class. Bleh. Damn bookstores don't buy as many as we need. Super lame.

Wow, so yeah

2008-09-05T21:11:00.000-05:00

I need to blog about a lot of stuff and get caught up. However taking 19 hours is chewing me up and spitting me out everyday. I can't even muster up the energy to write a decent blog entry. I also am going to put my reaction journal for my english class on here. Just because I want to. But the BIGGEST news is that I have a crap ton of writers interested in the Writers Guild thing I'm starting. Super cool!! Like the rough estimate is around 20 now!!!!!!!!

I couldn't be more excited to get started. This will really make me take the time to work on stuff since I'll be in a workshop group too. That's like 4-5 workshop groups I'll split them up into. Awesome! Anyway that's the only thing I really wanted to blog right now. Later this weekend I'll catch up on my reactions to my Violence in the American Renaissance class. I know awesome right? But I already verbally acted this girl in my class. Once again I've branded myself as an ex patriot. Joy of joys. But it's whatevs it fits with my current bitter/cynical coated view on life and love and politics right now. lol.

So, here's my semester

2008-08-27T13:39:00.000-05:00

19 hours of...

Anthropology: Folklore and the Supernatural
English: Violence in the American Renaissance
Linguistics: Language and Society
Chemistry: Just Intro with a bunch of freshman BIMS majors
oh and the lab that takes up my entire wednesday nights
Philosophy: Philosophy of Literature
Environmental Design: Designing for the Web

Woot for nerd classes.
Longer posts later...
Yes I know I keep promising that. But really, I will.

I have returned from the dead...

2008-08-22T02:17:00.000-05:00

tomorrow morning when I go to work and try to save my job I'll post a longer one. Just giving a heads up. I'll actually probably just edit this one. lol.

R.I.P. my red flip phone, you served me well. tomorrow I go to try and get a temp until the ebay fairies bestow upon me a new one.

I want to shoot myself.

2008-08-14T10:30:00.000-05:00

#1- I'm tired of whiny little girls who complain about all the stuff they have to do. I have a lot to do too and I don't complain I just get it done. I'm glad someone stepped in last night because I was going to stab her. Sorry. A little exaggeration and even though I did make her cry I didn't want to get in a blown out fight about it. I'm just VERY aggravated. I think I should leave town early today. Like after lunch.
#2- I don't know where I'm staying tonight/this weekend which stresses me out. I can't sleep in my car. I only know two people in Austin well enough to ask to stay with them and I can't get a hold of either of them.
#3- I for sure lost one of my scholarships. I only have one left now. At least I'm graduating this year so I won't be a burden on my parents too much longer. It's just REALLY aggravating when you need a 3.0 and I have a 2.985. Oh well.
#4- My boss is getting kinda antsy about me being gone a lot lately. But I've been here all freaking summer with no vacation at all. I'm sorry I'm not a workaholic like him but I have priorities and other obligation. This is the only two weeks in the whole year that I have to completely devote to the sorority and I even managed to somehow work every morning this week getting up early to get here around 8 when I went to bed past midnight.
#5- I have to fill out and fax all these forms and thank you letters to my donors for the only remaining scholarship I have so that I'll get my money next week. And right now I should be working. Lame.

I'm starting to get a stress headache. This wasn't supposed to be a super emo whinefest. But I guess that's what it turned into. I could go on but I don't have time.

See you if I'll see you this weekend at ArmadilloCon. I think I'm going to cut back on how many panels I go to so I get more time to just sit down and think. *sigh* Back to the grindstone.

Btw. I have succumbed to peer pressure.

2008-08-12T11:16:00.000-05:00

Yes it's true I've succumbed to the pressure of all my sorority sisters who are obsessed with this Twilight series. I borrowed the first one from someone in the house and am now similar mesmerized. Plus I'm gearing up to scare away the dumb girls from my sorority by asking them if they've read any good books lately and I better be ready to talk about this one apparently. I figure if I'm going to play the we're the cute but still smart sorority card I need to back it. lol. Plus I think I'm officially the only of a hundred girls that still hasn't read it.

I started this morning and I'm on page 105. It is very addicting. It's a pleasant read and I can see where it would be good for about the middle school level because it's engaging with a few good long words thrown in there every once in awhile. Really good words like irrevocably or surreptitiously. Anyway I figured I should just mention it since Lindsey started reading it last week.

I HATE HYPOCRISY!!

2008-08-12T10:36:00.000-05:00

I think one of the things I hate most in any one entity be it a person or country or business or any establishment is hypocrisy. Just be honest and mostly with yourself because anyone not completely ignorant can see right through you. Sadly I think America is mostly made up of hypocrisy and ignorance. With the whole Russia/Georgia fiasco going on this is what George Bush said (from the NYTimes article):

"Mr. Bush, little more than an hour after returning to Washington from the Olympic Games in Beijing, bluntly warned Russia on Monday that its military operations were damaging its reputation and were “unacceptable in the 21st century.”

“Russia’s actions this week have raised serious questions about its intent in Georgia and the region,” he said. “These actions have substantially damaged Russia’s standing in the world, and these actions jeopardize relations with the United States and Europe.”"

Delete Russia and add America... it means the same damn thing. Ridiculous. I'm sorry but he's an effing idiot. It just makes my skin crawl how hypocritical the American government is.

I'm only going to be posting infrequently the next week or so. The sorority is taking over my life for recruitment. ArmadilloCon this weekend. I'm looking forward to it. Two of the stories in my group are really good. I'm excited to reread this time to get my comments. I hope they liked mine...

The Russian Trepak!!!

2008-08-06T19:58:00.000-05:00

I'm so proud of So You Think You Can Dance for what they've done this season to introduce world dance to America. And! The fact that two hip hop dancers are in the finale. Hip Hop dancers dancing a Trepak?! Amazing.
I want America academia to think that way about bringing World Literature over here. That's all I'm saying.

Project Runway later. I'm exhausted. Summer school finally ended today and I get all of... three days off? before I'll be back for sorority stuff. Somewhere in there is ArmadilloCon. Woot! So I'll use this opportunity to publish what sessions I'm going to.

From 8:45 Friday morning until... uh I don't know when I'll be at the writers' workshop. After I take a break for food in there somewhere I'll be going to...

Fr1700DW Electronically Published Fiction: Fri 5:00 PM-6:00 PM deWitt; Burton*, Henderson, Huff, Marin, McKinney, Trimm; An examination of new publishing avenues opened by technology, and the best places to publish and read it.

Fr1800DZ Why I Write: Fri 6:00 PM-7:00 PM deZavala; Bey*, Sheridan, Swann, Wade, Swenson; Our panelists discuss why and how they transitioned from reader to writer.

Fr2000PF Meet the Pros Party: Fri 8:00 PM-10:00 PM Prefunction Area; Mingle with and meet your favorite writers, artists, and editors. They're friendly -- honest -- and would love to chat with you.

Fr2030DW Reading: Fri 8:30 PM-9:00 PM deWitt; J. M. McDermott

Fr2100DZ Interstitial Fiction: Fri 9:00 PM-10:00 PM deZavala; Denton, Klaw, Person, Richerson, Trimm*; A lot of recent fiction falls between the cracks of genre. There have been anthologies devoted to it, and now there is the Interstitial Arts Foundation. The most recent Nebula-winning novel falls into this category. What are the essential works and authors, and is this a full-fledged literary movement?

Fr2200DW Neglected Gems of Genre Fiction: Fri 10:00 PM-11:00 PM deWitt; Blaschke*, Brust, Graham, Hobson, Nakashima-Brown, Sheridan; Which works of speculative fiction are the most criminally-neglected?
Or? (If Lindsey is with me she'll want to go to this one \/ for sure. I won't have a choice.)
Fr2200DZ Adult Topics in SF & F: Fri 10:00 PM-11:00 PM deZavala; Hale, Huey, Kimbriel*, Roberts, C. Spector; Must be 18 or older to attend! We'll have a freestyle discussion of "advanced" topics including sensitive topics in fiction, specialized cons and fannish subgroups, and wherever else our panelists want to take it.

Saturday

YES! I don't have any panels I want to go to until noon. Brilliant. I can sleep.

Sa1200DZ Literary Criticism: Sat Noon-1:00 PM deZavala; Hobson, Huey, Kofmel, McDermott, Webb*, Wagner; How does critique of sf differ from that of mainstream literature? Where should one look for the best analysis? Is this the domain of fans, or are academics taking over?

Sa1300R Broad Universe Rapid Fire Reading: Sat 1:00 PM-2:00 PM Robertson; Burton, Dimond, Eudaly, Henderson, Latner, Leicht, N. J. Moore*, Reisman; Come hear several good but short readings by members of one of our favorite writers' organizations.

Sa1400DW What You Should Have Read: Sat 2:00 PM-3:00 PM deWitt; Dimond*, Hevelin, Klaw, Marin, W. Siros, S. Williams; Our distinguished panel of writers, editors, and book-sellers discuss their take on the most important, influential, and enjoyable books and stories of the year.

Sa1500DZ Sex, Drugs, and Urban Fantasy: Teen Fiction is Not For Kids: Sat 3:00 PM-4:00 PM deZavala; Chester, Leicht, J. Moore, Thomas, Sarath*, Wagner; "Young Adult" fiction sometimes seems obsessed with some adult or at least dark topics. Is this a natural reflection of the challenges facing the target audience, or a marketting excess?

Sa1600DW Crazy Grrlz: Slipstream Ain't Just for Boys: Sat 4:00 PM-5:00 PM deWitt; N. J. Moore, Nakashima-Brown, Oliver, Reisman, Ward, Wheeler*; The guys writing hard-to-classify alternative fiction have gotten a lot of attention, and labels such as "Texas Weird". What about the women working this same vein?

YES! A break for dinner!

Sa1900PN Paranormal Romance: Sat 7:00 PM-8:00 PM Phoenix North; Babcock*, Burton, Frost, Kenner, Kimbriel, Mallory; The romance genre has invaded our turf! A large portion of the sf shelves is devoted to the cross-genre paranormal romance. What are the attactions? Why are so many authors making the jump to this fast-growing movement?

Sa2000DZ Elves in Condos: Sat 8:00 PM-9:00 PM deZavala; Fletcher, Kenner, Rogers*, D. L. Smith, Swann, Wade; Urban fantasy isn't just a matter of putting elves on motorcycles or in a rock band. What is it -- and why is it so fascinating?

Sa2100DZ Metafiction in Comics: Sat 9:00 PM-10:00 PM deZavala; Benjamin, Blaschke, Klaw*, Porter, Potter; Metafiction has a long and rich history in comic books and graphic novels. Recent works such as Dr. 13, Nextwave, Scott Pilgrim and Ambush Bug have ushered in a new era for this insightful and entertaining storytelling method. What are some of the best examples, why do writers & artists use this method, and why has it become so popular?

Then it's nighty night!

Sunday

Su1000PN Religious Themes in SF: Sun 10:00 AM-11:00 AM Phoenix North; Broderick, Dimond*, Eudaly, Latner, Webb; How does religion inform our panelists’ writing? And how do they feel religion has been treated in science fiction?
or
Su1000DW Challenges of Writing Genre for Younger Readers: Sun 10:00 AM-11:00 AM deWitt; Benjamin, Chester, Fletcher*, J. Moore, C. L. Smith, M. Williams; How does writing for young adults differ from writing for adult readers? Our panelists discuss whether it’s harder, easier, or pretty much the same, but with a different label.
I can't decide...

and ALL of these sound interesting!

Su1100PN Alternate History: Sun 11:00 AM-Noon Phoenix North; Huff, J. Lansdale, Mills, Rogers, Utley, S. Williams*; Rome never falls, Dewey defeats Truman, New England Patriots defeat the Giants in the Superbowl. A discussion of writing alternate history and how to show how changes in the past can affect the present.
Su1100DW Living with a Creator: Sun 11:00 AM-Noon deWitt; C. Foster, G. Haldeman*, K. Lansdale, W. Spector, T. Wilson; What’s it like living with a writer or artist? Is it more boredom, like going to conventions where you have nothing to do because your spouse was invited? Or is it more excitement, such as seeing a new work spring from their fingertips? Our panelists will give us an idea of what living with a creator is like.
Su1100DZ No More Excuses: Making Writing a Part of Your Life: Sun 11:00 AM-Noon deZavala; Antonelli, Broderick, Kenner, Richerson, Sarath*, M. Wells; Having trouble fitting writing into your life? We'll have tips, tactics, and boot camp-style exhortations to get you to stop making excuses and spend more time writing.

LUNCH!!

Su1300PN From Agent to Editor to Publisher to Store: Sun 1:00 PM-2:00 PM Phoenix North; Finn, G. Haldeman, Leicht, Roberson, Rosen*; We examine the process and decisions between an author finishing a book and it showing up on store shelves.

I dunno. I think I'm gonna go home then!!!!!! Nothing else tickles my fancy enough to stay longer when I really should get back.

Another video for ya.

2008-08-04T20:30:00.000-05:00

I love Datarock. They have some awesome stuff. This song and music video is the cutest! It makes me think of those shirts that say, "Talk Nerdy to Me". I love nerdy guys.

Enjoy!

The Library is Bad for Me.

2008-08-04T10:25:00.000-05:00

I go in just to look something up or get one book I need for a paper and then bam! it's like I black out until I'm walking out of the library with 5-6 books in my arms and no idea how they got there. I think the library casts an enchanment on me to make sure that the really obscure, rarely read tomes of russian children's story (in russian) or dense studies of comparative literarture get out and see the sun. Maybe I should write a flash fiction piece on how books in the library subvert you into checking them out. Last time I went I ended up with like 10 books that I still haven't been able to read yet.
Now after this morning there are at least 5 books in the best seller section that I want to read including Kushiel's Legacy which I'm still waiting to come out in paperback, the new Nick Hornby, the new Salman Rushdie, the new Tamora Pierce, ooh ooh and this new epic fantasy based on Alice and Wonderland that makes it into a parallel universe. I know sounds cool right? Also! There's a new Colleen McCullough even though I haven't read the one in between Thorn Birds and this one either. But I love love love the Thorn Birds. In high school I was told I couldn't do a paper on it because it didn't have literary value, it was only a romance. Now as a future literary critic I beg to differ. It's a brilliant book that easily trascends generations (something very hard) yet still ties them all together. I really think the writing is great and that it deserves to be looked at as more than just a popular novel made into a mini-series (where of course they played up the sex more than was really necessary). Anyway I have to finish writing this paper so this afternoon I can exchange some of the books I've finished for those new ones I have my eye on. I can't wait!
Also I still need to get around to reading The Last Dragon by J.M. McDermott. It's been on the "to-read" list for awhile and I think it's hit the top finally. I almost bought an advance reading copy of it (it has a different cover) on ebay. I wonder if it'll be worth something one day.

Just watched War Games

2008-08-03T12:59:00.000-05:00

It was actually pretty good. With the genius kid who can hack into anything including a pay phone. lol. If only I knew that trick. It had a very clear message though which eerily echoes the one I've been reaching lately. This American Foreign Policy class I've taken has really morphed and cemented my already growing leftist leanings. Something my professor brought up was the rhetoric around the word terrorism. The word in the dictionary means an act of violence to gain a political goal. So in that form what's the difference in what our president has called terrorism and what we've done back to them? It's only war because it's state sponsored and therefore its legit. But is it really? I think I'm turning into a full blown dove of a political.

I really liked the end of War Games. The tic tac toe thing was pretty clever. That the computer can't win against itself so the only way to win is to not play the game. I think young Matthew Broderick in genius form is pretty darn attractive too.

I need to go to campus so I can write this damn paper. I'm thinking I might take a nap instead and stay up late writing.... The latter is much more likely.
Right now I'm about to finish watching Zoom on surfthechannel.com. They really released that too soon after Sky High. Tonight I think I'm gonna go see Hancock which I heard was actually quite good. I still haven't seen Dark Knight and I'm not sure if I should see it in theaters. I don't do violent/scary/intense very well.

Just finished Heroics for Beginners.

2008-07-31T17:41:00.000-05:00

So I just finished John Moore's really hilarious and well crafted Heroics for Beginners. I'll definitely be reading the others eventually. My style is a lot like his which makes me happy that it's marketable. Now if I can only make sure that my jokes are that funny.

----Edit----

Ok so. Some of my favorite parts of John Moore's book: that the evil overlord started out as an evil schoolteacher. I'm going to quote that on the first day of my class. My teaching style is to assert my dominance and then be cool with them. I liked the twist at the end and since I don't want to give anything away I won't say but it was good and I totally didn't predict it. Usually I can see something coming and I totally didn't expect that. Also I loved the hints of bondage and homosexuality. Just enough to be highly amusing. Oh and the threesome at the end (no you don't get to actually read it, but it's amusing). I thoroughly enjoyed it and can't wait to read the others. You should check them out.

New Trailer

2008-07-30T10:01:00.000-05:00

Maybe this will be good. It looks like they took the more character orientated approach to this one. But then again the Half-Blood Prince is all about character development. Snape, Harry, Voldemort, Dumbledore... And they have a lot of gaps to make up for. I feel bad for the people who only see the movies because its very hard to see what's going on. I have to go see all of them twice because my mom makes me go with her to explain everything while we watch. Hard to enjoy when I'm constantly identifying characters for her and giving her the background she needs to understand.

Anyway here's the trailer. Ripped from Youtube. Now I really need to study or I might fail this test. Not good.

Fun video.

2008-07-29T23:54:00.000-05:00

Just because I felt like it. Enjoy. :D

Does serendipity exist?

2008-07-29T22:00:00.000-05:00

I think I've realized that fantasy novels gave me a very clear idea of the kind of woman I would be:
Independent
Pursue a career in what I love
Not take crap from anyone
Somehow become amazing successful doing what I love (success to me is not measured in money btw)

Also it gave me a very clear idea of what kind of guy I wanted to end up with:
Passionate
Talented
Respects me for being who I am
Someone who loves me for me

Now... I think those are amazing things that I got out of reading what I did growing up. (Thanks Mercedes Lackey, I should invite you to my wedding. If I ever have one.) Also recently I've decided that I probably won't get married. I'm going to take a lover. (lol. I'm kidding but really I don't care so much about the wedding, more about finding the guy... eventually. I just think its fun to say taking a lover.)

Anyway that was an interesting side note. What I was getting to was inspired by a conversation with my roommate and the fact that I just watched the end of the movie Serendipity on tv. One thing that I think Fantasy novels doesn't make real enough if how people meet. Or how relationships start. Which is something I really want to do well in my novel. I was rereading a series I read when I was little. There were 8 books in the series and I loved all of them. (Back then when I read them.) Rereading them, there were things I still liked about them but how the people met/fell in love was SOOO unrealistic. A freak hurricane blew his ship off course and he landed on an island which just so happened to have a princess there, who was single and they were perfect for each other. What bull shit! Yes I'm being a cynic here, but really.

So I think that's something that's missing from most fantasy. I like the parody I'm reading right now. Even though again romantically... its very cliche still. Maybe they won't end up together... haha. How negative am I?

Ok I definitely don't want this to end up being a blog about my love life but since love lives in general are driving the sub plot of my novel thinking about this kind of stuff is good. lol. Anyway I'll stop rambling.

Has anyone noticed I might slightly have ADD? I'm very sorry for the side comments. If you've ever experienced me trying to tell a story in person, you totally understand how I write my blog entries.

No FenCon for me.

2008-07-29T08:29:00.000-05:00

I haven't finished the new story I wanted to send. I don't want to send the Merlin story again, I feel like it's bad form to send the same story to three workshops in a row. Plus I seriously can't afford the workshop at FenCon right now. It's $35 on top of the regular membership that's $70. I'm still gonna go but just as a convention going not a workshopper. That makes me kinda sad but this is my last week of summer school and somehow I need to make myself focus on finishing my classes. Trying to write a story during that just won't work. It's ok though. Because I really like where the Shep story is going and I don't want to rush it.

AND!!!! FenCon will be my birthday weekend. You better believe I'm going to panels hungover. :D I need to bring someone with me to be my keeper. lol. Hey I'll be 21. You're supposed to engage in debauchery on your 21st birthday!! No I won't really be that bad. I'm just trying to cheer up because I can't do this workshop. It's ok! I'm going to work on querying those Wainscot essays to Strange Horizons. Oh and they might want to publish my Merlin story eventually too. Because I didn't know but a fellow workshop attendee from ApolloCon pointed out to me that they're interested in Hypertext stories. Which the Merlin Story very well could be. I wish I could get an artist to do a picture for the newspaper for me. Maybe I'll try to find one sometime soon.... Who do I know that's an artist?

FACELIFT!!!!!

2008-07-28T16:18:00.000-05:00

So. I tried to make my blog more... original. I like it better. Even though I liked the green. This suits me well. I got rid of most of the pink. But hey I'm pretty girly and I'm not trying to hide that. I have on more section I think thought of to add so I'll do that in second. How do you feel about it? All of two people I'm pretty sure read this blog on an infrequent basis. lol. I like that it has a theme and one that is uniquely me. :D Anyway I should get back to work. You know the job I get paid for doing as little as possible. Trying harder at work is on my list of things to do better in the future along with writing more. Off to data entry and calendar editing I go. It's really cold at work today too. I should have worn jeans. But it's just so damn hot outside. I'm like serious, even in the summer I have to wear a sweatshirt at work if I'm here longer than an hour. My fingers start to cramp up and I have to go outside to thaw them out so I can type. My wpm is dependent on the amount of time I spend in here and that slope is negative. (Can you tell I have a math quiz tomorrow?)

This is great,

2008-07-28T09:56:00.000-05:00

I would totally at least give a guy that would say or actually do this a chance. lol. I recently joined up at the Absolute Write forums and while browsing around came across a post asking for dating advice by a guy with Asperger's Syndrome. I was honest with him and just said that I'm supposed to be normal and have the exact same fear or over thinking that he does. Just goes to show you that dating sucks all around whether you like it or not. But one reply I thought was really clever and cute:

"Well, that's an easy one: [in reference to someone asking about how to take the step from being a friend to a boyfriend]

1: Send her a query letter with all of your basic information. Make sure to include your special traits (snore volume, peck-dance duration, etc.) and remember to include any successful past relationships. Friendships and internet relationships do not count.

2a: Wait three to four weeks. She may ask for a synopsis, so be prepared to write one or have one already prepared (2k words maximum). Include only the important aspects of yourself and your past. Remember, she's probably very busy.

2b: If you do not hear back by then, take it as a rejection and try again. The carpet-bomb query method is NOT advised here.

3a: If she likes what she reads, she may ask to meet you in person. Keep in mind that rejection is not too late at this point, but your chances are quite good.

3b: Refer to 2b.

4: If you're still in the game at this point and the up-front meeting has gone well, congratulations, she's interested! (Note* Future binding contracts may be required, along with multiple-child deals.)"

If you want to read the whole thread this is it:
http://absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?p=2595907&posted=1#post2595907

But I just thought that was pretty amusing and wanted to share. If only dating were that easy. Honestly when you think about it shopping out a novel is a lot easier than dating.

Haha. So if I ever get discouraged about my writing career I'll just look at my love life for the "it could be worse."

I'm baking...

2008-07-26T15:09:00.000-05:00

brownies!! So this weekend didn't go as planned. But it's probably better for me to just chill this weekend and not worry about going to doing things. To just relax and not have any demands on my time. Hopefully I can get some writing done because I need to send a story off for fencon asap. I slept in (after driving home at 3 in the morning, dumbest thing I've ever done) and have just watched tv doing nothing all day. I'm watching My Best Friend's Wedding, which yes I actually have on DVD but oh well. I love it so I'm going to watch it again anyway.

So. I'm actually a pretty good cook. When I have time to do it all. I especially like to cook Italian food. I make a mean chicken parmigiana. That reminds me of a good quote from a writer at ApolloCon that reading writing books are like reading cookbooks, that sounds good but I'll never make it. lol. I'm reading On Becoming a Novelist so I'm going to keep that in mind. I'm also reading this nifty publication of his college diary.

Oh! I finished Practical Demonkeeping by Christopher Moore. It was great! All the different pov shifts were well done and it all meshed so great. It was a great one shot and made me see that I could write a good novel that doesn't have to be a series. (Well maybe after my career is established. lol. We'll see how it goes.) I want to read A Dirty Job next. Or You Suck. I think he's a great writer. The characters were believable and heart felt. He's also really funny in a subtle way. I hope I can pare down the humor in my stories that way.

Lola, out.

RAWR!! I hate America and I hate people who love America.

2008-07-22T15:51:00.000-05:00

I can't even begin to type all the things that bother me DEEPLY about American politics and rhetoric. So I won't bore you with another long rambly, rant driven post. I'll just say this America is not perfect, we do not have a RIGHT to rule the world economically, and although we say we're helping make the world a better place, we're simply not. If we use rhetoric like that we need to back it up. I think America is one of the most dishonest countries around. We use all this false rhetoric and create monsters of it like the red scare (which still pervades today). We don't back it up and we stand by and do nothing when those things happen. I'm starting to rant again. Basically I had another revelation today of how much I do NOT belong at A&M. I can't wait for the next two semesters to be over any quicker. I'm stifled here. I did not want to debate this guy in my American Foreign Relations class today but my professor insisted that I rebut him. At least the professor backed me up.
I think I need to think more seriously about moving abroad. Is it harder? Yes. Might I be happier? I don't know. I really don't know where life will take me but if I talk all the time about how I don't like how America does things maybe I should move abroad. I mean Terry Prachett is British. Aren't their foreign publishing houses that would publish my fiction? *sigh* It's been mentioned by people to me before and I think I need to think more seriously about doing some of my graduate work abroad.
Is it really A&M that's stifling me or is it really America itself? Wow. Big realization. I dunno where this big adventure of life is going to take me.

Avatar is A-mazing.

2008-07-21T18:22:00.000-05:00

So I just watched the last episode of this season. Holy friggin' cow, was it amazing or what? I'm lucky that I bought a season pass on itunes over christmas and I could just download them all to watch at my leisure. At the end I was almost scared it was over over. But apparently Nick signed on for three more seasons. For sure it's not going to be about Aang and the gang but will still be in the Avatar world. So I'll be happy. The rumors are either its going to be in the past or Aang and them's future. I hope in the future so we get to see what happens to Aang and everyone grown up. I secretly think Toph is a lesbian. However I doubt they'll show that on the show. Lame, but it is a kid's show.
I felt really bad but their portrayal of Azula at the end was awesome. She really just lost it when she finally got everything she wanted. You know some people are just better at fighting and after they win the war they don't know what to do with themselves. They did a superb job of that. However I think it's more likely that they'll either do a future or past incarnation of the Avatar so Aang and them won't be in the picture at all. Unless in a kind of historical way (if they choose future). But overall the whole show was FUCKING AMAZING!! *sigh* Now what do I watch? Maybe I should pitch my own idea to Nickelodeon. Ya know something always bothered me. Avatar is SOO different from the other Nick shows. Like it just comes out of left field amidst all the other shit. I wish everyone took so much care into crafting their kids shows.
It was amazing how they did the ending with the energy bending. Whew I was sweating bullets for a second and I think I even cried outloud, "No Aang fight it!" (haha like a little kid) when the firelord's energy was starting to overcome him. And the lionturtle how friggin' cool?!?!?!?!?! Ok I'm done rambling. Just wanted to share my thoughts.

Summary of the Last Two Days

2008-07-19T19:07:00.000-05:00

So. Here goes. Yesterday I had a good talk with my old creative writing teacher, who's actually very young. I really love her and like another old prof, who's also actually young, I hope we become good friends now that the teacher/pupil line is muddied. Anyway so we talked about books and the develops in my life with writing. Of course I forgot to ask her help on my POV problem which was the whole reason I'd asked to meet with her in the first place but whatever. I think I might have already figured out what to do but seeing as all the solutions I come up with are going to take MASSIVE rewriting I want to work on something new for awhile. Enter Shep, Adolph and... good question our leading lady still doesn't have a name. Well there's Chloe, but she's a sheep and not as important as Shep thinks she is. Besides the point.
So talking with Karen was nice and hearing her reassure me that taking a year off will be a good thing. She's very proud of me for all the things I'm doing to work toward getting published. In fact she said, "You're totally going to get published before me. Tell me how it feels." lol. She's still getting rejection letters. But I think creative nonfiction is a way more difficult market to break into. I dunno if I have readers out there you tell me. In our age of the confessional self I think creative nonfiction is a pretty saturated market. But what do I know?
On another front today I went to a wedding for a girl I graduated with. She's 19. Yeah she was the youngest in our grade and won't turn 20 until August. Crazy. This is why people start getting married too soon. First one and then everyone follows suit and most don't make it. Well I won't be trapped in that. I don't really keep boyfriends because unless they're someone that can actually put up with me and I'm genuinely interested in (meaning they meet my impossibly high standards) then they're not worth my time. Those guys rarely come around and I have too much other shit to worry about to waste valuable school, friend, family, or writing time (in no particular order). It was just super weird being at that wedding. *shiver* So I'm going to try and forget it. Now I'm off to dinner. Sorry this turned into a post about my relationship views. Haha. Not my intention.

Good news about publishing...

2008-07-18T09:41:00.000-05:00

Well no I haven't been published yet. But I'm sure I will be soon!!! No not my fiction either. That still needs a lot of work. However I know my critical stuff is stellar and until this morning I didn't know that Strange Horizons publishes critical essays! Now if I only knew how to write a query email properly... (don't worry I'm just going to google it). I'm going to see if they'd like me to adapt some of my essays that relate to speculative fiction (which several do). You only get 50 bucks per article but I really don't care about the money. How awesome would it be for someone to read what I thought critically. And care?! I know posting this is premature but it was just fate that I somehow ended up on their website this morning. That is my ultimate dream. Writing fiction is just a side project I do for fun. What I really want is for people to listen to what I have to say about speculative fiction. And believe me when I say that some of it is important to the literary cannon. Oooh I can't wait. But first I need to study for my math quiz today. Then later I'm sending off those query emails!!! They haven't had any true critical essays to publish in awhile either. So maybe they'll be excited too.

My Emmy Picks

2008-07-17T22:06:00.000-05:00

I'm going to make my predictions although I'll probably be wrong. Since I don't actually watch all these shows. So I'll probably pick the ones that I do watch just because those are my favorites. I'll try to be as objective as possible (which isn't much).

Outstanding Comedy Series: The Office, or 30 Rock, I don't watch the later but it looks funny. I can only watch so many sitcoms a season. Not enough time. Although I have started to watch back episodes of How I Met Your Mother which is hilarious! Also I didn't know Entourage was a comedy...

Btw. I'm watching the recap online from enews as I'm typing. So having said that. YAY FOR PUSHING DAISIES!!!!! I'm so excited hopefully this means it'll come back. I love loved it. All the characters were great and the actors brilliant. So glad they got so many nominations. 12 to be exact!!!

I will shoot myself if Ryan Seacrest wins for Reality TV Show Host(which is a bogus category, I can't believe Cat Deeley didn't get a nom. I think she's great on SYTYCD.)

Best Drama: I want House to win but I think Mad Men will get it again. I think its so funny to hear Hugh Laurie speak with his regular accent. I heard him say once acting with an American accent is like trying batting left handed if you're not. Oh Hugh. What a hunk.

And I need to start watching The View apparently. Ok e online lied. They didn't show all the nominations. Hold on I'm going to find a list... Hmm. Maybe this is a too complete list but I'll go through all of it anyway just for funsies.

Outstanding Animated Program: Robot Chicken! I saw an episode once and it was strangely funny. So that's who I'm pulling for.

I said Emmy Picks in the title. I'll stick with that. These aren't my predictions but who I think should win. We'll see if any of them get it.

Outstanding Art Direction For A Miniseries: Tin Man! It looks awesome. I saw a few of the episodes when they ran it and my roommate has to full thing so I rewatched it recently. Plus who doesn't love Zooey Deshcanel? Music tip, check out her band She and Him. Very loveable pop stuff. I like it a lot.

Outstanding Casting For A Comedy Series: Pushing Daisies! Like I said earlier all the actors in it are great for the characters so obviously its due to great casting. I think being a casting director would be a fun job.

Outstanding Choreography: Anyone from So You Think You Can Dance but I'm pulling for Shane Sparks. They took almost all the noms. lol. Because that show is amazing!

Outstanding Cinematography For Nonfiction Programming- Meerkat Manor. Apparently college students really love this show... They get like really into. I've never seen it before but I've heard people talk about it. lol. *shrug* Who knew?

Sidenote: I'm skipping over a lot of the more random but not less important ones like costume, etc.

Outstanding Directing For A Comedy Series: Flight of the Conchords!!!!!!! Love love love. These are all great. I've seen most of the episodes on youtube but my friend Matt has them all on DVD. Most fun. Sidenote, they won a grammy for best comedy album from songs they did on this series.

Outstanding Directing For A Variety, Music Or Comedy Program: The Colbert Report!!! Just because he's amazing. Or The Daily Show because that's how I get all my honest political news. They're the only ones who tell the truth anymore. Because the truth is a novelty!

Outstanding Hairstyling For A Miniseries Or A Movie: Tin Man! I'm only mentioning this one because truly the hair (and they're also up for best costume which they should win) is amazing! Very well done. It still held that Oz-esque type fantastique but pushed it into the 21st century.

Outstanding Host For A Reality Or Reality - Competition Program: Heidi Klum! And not just because I watch that show and love it. But she actually gets to help judge too, she has skills. Doesn't just look stupid or say stupid things (*cough* Ryan).

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Comedy Series: Yay!! Lee Pace as Ned in Pushing Daises. This is actually a really complex comedic character he's playing. And he does it very well.

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Drama Series: Hugh Laurie!!!! as House in House. lol. He's great! I mean with all the new characters coming and going last season he really had to step up the acting and hold the show together until he got the new team in there so we could start to connect to them. He's brilliant as well.

Outstanding Lead Actress In A Drama Series: I hope Sally Field gets it for Brothers and Sisters. My mom watches the show. I've only ever seen one episode. Where I almost got in a fight with my parents because they were uncomfortable that the gay brother was getting married. Good-ness. Don't get me started. But anyway. I HATE Holly Hunter in Saving Grace. Oh my gawd!!!! Bleh. And Kyra Sedgwick gets on my nerves.

Outstanding Miniseries: Well obviously you can tell I'm going to say Tin Man. I hope it gets it!!! Go SCI FI CHANNEL!!! Have you seen their mini series The Lost Room? I loved that one too. I thought it was really well done and ended kinda abruptly. I wanted it to have more episodes. You can rent that on DVD too.

Outstanding Original Music And Lyrics: Obviously one of the Flight of the Conchords' songs is going to win. But I put this on here to say what kind of idiot nominated a kids song with such HORRIBLE grammar!!! "I Ain't Got No Rhythm" Wow. Just wow. That person should be shot. And the Disney person who allowed that song to be written should be shot too.

Outstanding Reality Program: Ok for the competition one that was right above this I choose Project Runway of course. But this category I'm very torn between Antiques Roadshow, because I mean seriously that show has been trucking along for EVER (when they came to Houston my mom, aunt, and I definitely went on it, we didn't make it on tv but you can briefly see me walk by on camera behind someone they were filming lol) or Dirty Jobs OR Kathy Griffin. I think I'm going to have to go with Kathy Griffin. Because her show is hilarious.

Almost done I promise! I know I want to go to bed and quit typing but I'm going to see this through!

Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Comedy Series: Well I like Neil Patrick Harris in How I Met Your Mother but really who can beat Dwight? He's like the comedic highlight of The Office other than Steve Carell as Michael Scott, whom I can't believe didn't get a nom for main actor in a comedy series.

Ok. And I want to comment on all the best writing categories but I've only seen the episode of Pushing Daises. I think all the writing for Pushing Daises is great. No really it is. And... I think the writing for The Daily Show is still better than the Colbert Report. Sorry Stephen. I like you better though.

THAT'S IT FOLKS!!

Writers Workshop

2008-07-16T15:50:00.000-05:00

I'm really excited about running the newly revived Writers Guild for Cepheid Variable (the Sci Fi/Fantasy Club at A&M). I wish I'd gotten involved with Cepheid earlier so they were more familiar with me. It's very hard to get break into the group when I only (thank god) have a year left at A&M. Am I crazy for taking 19 hours? Yes. Will I be more sane when I'm not bogged down in A&M anymore? Yes. Therefore they cancel each other out and make sense. But back to Writers Guild. I hope to get some of the locally-based writers I've met at conventions to come talk or want to hold a workshop in their own town. Everyone at conventions has been so nice and helpful I thought they might be open to the idea. Except I'm an idiot and forgot to attach the syllabus file. Dur. Yes I have a syllabus for next semester. Do you believe me now that I want to be a professor? I'm supposed to write criticism stuff on here too. I haven't had much to write about lately. Hopefully since I'm taking Children's Lit next semester I'll have more to talk about. I'm looking forward to expanding my paper on Wainscott worlds. Which I think could eventually be a book. I need that PhD first. So many goals so far in the future. I have to get through math first.

Sorry if that was ramble-y, I think my apartment has mold that has my allergies set off and I took a lot of allergy medicine this morning. It took effect right in the middle of my math class making me say some really silly things out loud and right now I'm having trouble focusing. Plus I'm dizzy. I'm not supposed to operate any heavy machinery right now either. Does that include my car? Good thing I rode the bus to campus.

Sidenote: I change my terminology about sci fi/fantasy things depending on who I'm around. I become aware of this earlier in this post when I kept calling conventions conferences. Because I tell other people that they're special writing conferences. lol. I think I'll always have that closet nerd mechanism that doesn't want to completely share that side of my life with people. I also tend to tell people that I write fiction. The more general you are the less they actually know. It's something I developed very early in life starting when I would habitually hide fantasy book covers when I was in school. It would probably make a funny creative non-fiction essay. Lola, the closet nerd.
Shit. I need to post this already and go take a nap so I'll quit losing my mind. I've rambled too much. I hope its at least partially coherent. Although I doubt it. The end.

I have main characters!

2008-07-15T20:51:00.000-05:00

WOOOO!!! Lots of character building and plotting going on. The prologue and first chapter are plotting out and that's what I'm going to turn in for FenCon writers workshop. Woot! I've decided not to send in the Merlin story for the contest. It's not even close to being ready yet and I need to leave it be for a little while. Right now I want to scrap it and just rewrite the whole damn thing. Which I'll probably end up doing mostly but not right now. Anyway. Lindsey is bugging me to leave the coffee place we've been working at. So! Until tomorrow. I'm just excited that this is shaping up well.

I love free food at work!

2008-07-14T13:51:00.000-05:00

Looks like we're going to be getting free food all week. Woot! Or at least through wednesday. I need to check and see how long we're hosting this camp for. Also on a silly yet heartening note I will be 21 by FenCon weekend and can sit at the bar with writers without feeling like a douche for drinking water. Also I hate when people make me feel young. I try very hard to give off an aura of being much older than I am and knowing much more than I actually do. Although I'm neither ashamed to admit how old I am nor when I don't know something if asked directly. I think lying by omission is fine but there's nothing wrong with being young and still learning if someone wants to know so badly. Sorry. Rant over. But the good news about drinking at FenCon makes me excited.

Ok final stretch................

2008-07-14T11:36:00.000-05:00

This week is my final stretch for polishing up the Merlin Story and entering it in the FenCon short story contest. I also need to work on writing something new for the FenCon writers workshop. Which I hope I can do fast enough to secure one of the last spots. I have the beginning of the Shep story but I don't know whether that's worth working on right now or if I should try to get the first chapter of the Muse story done. Well the prologue and first chapter. *sigh* I dunno. But finishing up the Merlin Story first is imperative because I'm going to try and mail it thursday. So seems like I'm going to be spending all my free time this week writing! But that's always fun. I think I write better with deadlines and expectations. So off to class then finish up at work and get home to write!

I had a story idea last night about people with empathy type powers. But that there were other people out there that were emote'rs who give off negative and positive emotional energy. Hmm. I dunno it was right before I fell asleep I'm surprised I even remembered it.

Just saw Hell Boy II...

2008-07-13T18:27:00.000-05:00

and it was freakin' sweet! A little predictable at times but it was beautiful and I liked being right at the end. I won't spoil anything in case someone actually reading this hasn't seen it yet. It was definitely worth seeing. My friend Lindsey didn't really want to see it but she was glad she did when it was over. So go see it! They were really smart to bring in the Pan's Labyrinth guy. I think this one was better than the first. OH! And the ectoplasm guy's powers were WICKED COOL!! Just go and you'll see for yourself. With movies I'm not much for analyzing it too much. If I enjoyed it that's all that mattered. Although the message of it really made me sad. Even being a human myself I don't know whether we deserve to take over the world. :/ You'll understand when you see it. So I'll shut up. Lindsey is going to read tonight at Poetry night again. She's so awesome! I kind of having an inkling of wanting to do it myself but... I dunno. I'm not as good at poetry anymore.

AHHHHH!!!!

2008-07-13T14:27:00.000-05:00

Ok. I have a lot of fears. Do they keep me from living my life? Not usually. But I REALLY HATE/AM AFRAID OF ROACHES!!!! I can't wait to move in the sorority house. I can't live like this. I feel something on my foot and guess what. It was the worlds most disgusting bug. I'm still shaking because I was freaking out. The people that live around me probably think I'm psycho. ARGH!!!!! Yuck yuck yuck. I know this was unnecessary to post but I am anyway. One day I'm going to write something where the entire world's population of roaches is exterminated. Permanently. I'll invent some kind of cute cuddly brownie type creature to do the ecological job of roaches.

RAWRRRRRRR!!! I'm still freaking. Hate hate hate. *violent shiver*

So.... lately

2008-07-13T08:41:00.000-05:00

I've bought too many books, lately. I raided the used bookstore when I was home for July 4th weekend. I picked up some really awesome old issues of Assimov's. Like '85 issues. Back when Marion Zimmer Bradley, Harlan Ellison, Jane Yolen, etc. when populating its pages. But my favorite part of them is the old book reviews and movies reviews. lol. I don't know why. I also think that my used bookstore at home has a wealth of first editions laying around that no one has mined yet. My coffee's ready so I better go to it. More sorority stuff today. I got official permission yesterday to miss alum skit day therefore I will be at ArmadilloCon for sure!!

This really upsets me.

2008-07-09T10:17:00.000-05:00

I'll freely admit that I'm not a good catholic anymore. I was raised super catholic and when I went to college along with all my other views of the world my mind was widened. Now I'd consider myself technically agnostic, but being raised Catholic and having to deal with people's misconceptions all the time really affected me. My earliest memory was when my super baptist friends would ask me questions but not really want to hear the answers. That was middle school. Eventually our different faiths caused us to grow apart. Which is a ridiculous reason to not be someone's friend anymore.
Oh what sparked this is that a catholic church in Houston has been experiencing some horrendous hate crimes. Desecration of statues and at one point someone spray painted something to the effect of that you shouldn't worship idols. Reading that article is what upset me. And I figured for once maybe I'll put something serious on this blog.
We don't worship false idols. I've never understood why people think praying to Mary for guidance or support is bad. Give the woman a break! Her whole life was fucked up because of Jesus and she still went on to be the best mom ever. Joseph too all of a sudden his woman is knocked up and not by him but he stood by her. How brave did they have to be? I don't see anything wrong whatsoever in giving them props.
Also when the pope died, through the mercy of God may his soul rest in peace, I had a huge blowout with one of my friend's Church of Christ boyfriend about that we shouldn't have a pope at all.
I HATE when people bible thump at me. No I don't have memorized bible verses in my arsenal to through at unsuspecting bystanders at any moment. But I also don't try to force my religion on people. By the time a cradle Catholic is 18 they will have read the whole bible 9 times through. (I am a cradle Catholic and this is probably true for me because my family did not miss church growing up. Even if we were out of town we found a church in that town to go to on sunday.) Actually learning from it not memorizing it blindly. Sorry to get on my soap box but this is something that's really bothered me my whole life.
The real problem is the people vandalizing that church don't have anything better to do with their time. Which is sad. Do something productive if you have so much time.

I hate haters.

Anyway on another note my f key is being weird and I have to hit it really hard for it to type correctly. I also really need to study for the quiz I have in math today. Fuck math.

I love my boss

2008-07-07T17:06:00.000-05:00

We went from listening to Phil Collins to Gregorian Chant to something in Spanish... In that order. There's no way I can quit this job. It's too sweet of a deal for while I'm still stuck in College Station and I can talk as much shit about hating A&M as I want to. Because my boss went to UT and we have similar political views. Not typical-American view that is. Anyway. I'm at work now if you couldn't surmise that.

Last night was WAY fun. My friend Lindsey who is an amazing poet finally read at an open mic night over in Bryan. The poem she read was A-mazing. I'm so proud of her because that was super hard. A few random people came up and said they really enjoyed it. Also one of the other poets came and asked her to come back because they really liked getting new poets, especially good ones. (Her words not mine, although I heartily agree.) Also I wasn't a big believer in slam poetry. They had a head to head competition of slam poets and OH MY GOSH THOSE PEOPLE ARE AMAZING! They were so good and it wasn't just random rhyming things. They told whole stories and talked about current issues. It was... brilliant. They were so good. And most of them off the top of their head. Crazy amazing good. I dunno how else to describe it.

Then! We went back to Lindsey's and watched The Fifth Element which she hadn't seen before. lol. I forgot how funny it was. Especially Chris Rock's character. That's all that's new. I need to study tonight. I locked my purse (with my keys and phone and debit card) in my car earlier today. The funny thing I happened to actually be holding a book. So if all else failed I could have read until someone came to help me. lol. Also I made a B in pols. Boo. If I make A's in both of my other classes though I'll keep my scholarship.

I'll have a better post tonight

2008-07-06T11:03:00.000-05:00

about feminine fairy tales and folk tales with strong female characters. However until I get home tonight and can look up the quotes I want to include.... I'll start off the day with this.

I've always thought that Disney movies are detrimental to little girls ideas of romance. I truly think that reading so many fantasy novels (especially Mercedes Lackey who has lots of strong female characters) is what made me into the independent woman I am today. However I think some of them still paint unrealistic ideas of romance. Not of women but of romances. Because the guy doesn't always get the girl and not every unique independent girl finds someone who loves her for her. At least I still haven't. Do I have this unrealistic idea that someday a guy will fall madly in love with my weird quirks because of what I've read? Of course it sex (and therefore romance) sells. But I really like the novel I'm working on right now because my main character's romances are so messed up. It's her friendships that really get her through it. I think this is more realistic. What made me think of this is I was skimming over a book I've read a long time ago by Jennifer Roberson it was Track of the White Wolf.

--> Sidenote I got this book yesterday at the Used Book store and I'm pretty sure it was my book to begin with. I donated a whole bunch of my paperbacks years ago and I keep ending up buying them back through this used bookstore. I feel pretty dumb about it. lol.

But Niall the main character just so happens to get ship wrecked on this island and the daughter of the ruler there is wild and carefree. They fall in love blah blah blah. It was all just too perfect for me. Love is anything but perfect. More fantasy novels should reflect this. Jacqueline Carey on the other hand is one that I think really does a good job of making her characters suffer for love. I mean Phedre and Jocelin hate each other at the beginning you have no clue how they're going to end up together. She's a brilliant one that Miss? Mrs? Carey. I hope I meet her someday. Anyway I better get a shower and drive back to College Station (oh shoot me now). Only 11 more months until I get out!!

Today wasn't what I thought it would be...

2008-07-05T21:26:00.000-05:00

So I went to visit my Great Aunt today. Well... her grave that is. I thought I would cry, because I always cry. But I didn't. I dunno if I just tried to stay numb. That's not me though. I was going to sit there and write for awhile but there were ants. I'll go back soon. I just wanted to tell her about everything in my life. She would be so proud of me. I miss her terribly. I can't believe its only been 7 years since she died. I feel like it was forever ago. She would be 98 this year. What an amazing lady she was. One day I'll write some creative non-fiction essays on her. This weekend was kind of relaxing. I didn't want to come home because I really wanted a weekend off where I didn't have to drive back and forth to houston. But it turned out ok. I need to concentrate on school and writing until school starts. Um.. not as much of an update today as I thought there would be... hmm lame.

Anyway. I'll leave you with something funny.

Need to leave for Home

2008-07-04T12:40:00.000-05:00

I was going to stay in town and relax this weekend but my mom really seemed sad when I said I wasn't coming. I should have left hours ago but got caught up in putting all the books on my shelves into my new LibraryThing library profile. But I'm all finished now. I didn't realize how random some of the books I've found at my local used book store in Liberty are. Probably not rare but definitely random. Most of them no more than 20 people on Librarything had the same book. lol. Then again most of the random ones were Russian Non-Fiction. I wonder if people censor out those books because they don't want people to see they read them. I'm sorry people I'm not a communist but Russian Literature is THE BEST. Way better than American or British. I sincerely hate when people ask if I'm communist. Bleh. I should just start answering yes for the hell of it. I'm a RUSSIAN MINOR PEOPLE!!! I have to read and write and even speak the language but that doesn't make me a communist. Actually most Russians weren't communists, that was a political party and most Russians had no clue what was going on with the government until it was too late. Don't blame the whole damn country.... I should stop. Sorry.

Ok I need to get ready to drive to good ol' Liberty. Bleh. On a lighter note my cat is being crazy right now and amusing me. Everyone should have a cat because they're awesome. That was random I know.
Check out my LibraryThing. Just for funsies.

Weekly Album Suggestion

2008-07-03T10:36:00.000-05:00

Since indie music is an important part of my life, I'm going to start doing an album of the week. I have two radio shows this summer. Next fall I'll take up the mantle of Girls Can Tell again. But this summer for fun I added The Way We Get By which is a more genre specific show. Well as specific as my taste can get. I like variety.

Anyway! Album of the week is....

We Started Nothing by The Ting Tings
Check out the tracks: That's Not My Name and Great DJ

Research & Star Wars

2008-07-02T18:40:00.005-05:00

1. 7-2-08, 6:45 pm
2. Err... I dunno I have until 9:30 ish when I go study for math. Can I mention that I hate math? Because I most certainly do! Anyway. I'll research for an hour, eat and then if I have time I'll do some more.
3. I'm world building for the Muse Story. Mostly greek mythology research and how I want to adapt it to my world.
4. It's 8:45 ish. So I worked for two hours. Not really constantly. But I did a lot of research and saved a lot of pages I can go back and read more intimately. Basically I found all the references to the muses (which a lot are just that mere references) so I'll go back and see if any of them are useful. I did a lot of world building though! There are others out there too now, not just muses but sirens, graces, etc. Woot! Fun times being imaginative.
5. I'm going to wake up tomorrow morning at 7 and work some more.

Writer's Quote of the Day:
"I started thinking about knighthood, and wondering why that period has an eternal fascination for us. Greek myth is laid in the Golden Age. "
-Gene Wolfe

Disney is the root of all evil.

2008-07-02T16:45:00.000-05:00

I think this is funny. I've had it on my work computer for awhile. Disney seriously messes up little girls ideas of real romantic relationships and how hair can look. lol. Enjoy. I'm going to start posting more fun images every once in awhile.

I need to leave for class...

2008-07-02T11:01:00.000-05:00

But I'm just going to cross the street and catch the bus on the way out. I think I hear it at my stop right now. Oh well. So.... I think I've decided to wait a year to apply for graduate school. Then I can apply early next year and have been able to take the GRE as many times as needed to make a kick ass score. Plus my GPA will be higher after the spring semester than this fall and I'll have had plenty of time to write an amazing critical writing sample (all 20 pages) that will knock the socks off the admission staff. It all just seems much better the more I think about it. However that also means while I'm biding my time somewhere (probably Austin or Houston) I will have time to really get to writing. I'll just got a grunt job somewhere part time for rent money and write full time! Woot. I think this is a brilliant plan and more conducive to both career goals.

Here are my goals for the summer:
-Edit and finish off the Merlin story, submit it for the FenCon Short Story Contest and then do market research on where to send it. According to Amy Sisson this weekend I should look into online publishing because they'll be able to do cooler things with the formatting. According to Kate Sanger I should look into some of the more humorous/light fantasy venues. She said she would email me a more detailed list. They were so nice!!
-Work on the Shep story. Send it off as soon as possible for FenCon writers workshop.
-Keep researching and taking notes for both novels. Which my American Foreign Relations class is really getting my head spinning again about the Xavier world. I'm planning a weekend trip to Austin mid-July to research for the Muse world. But there's plenty of world building I can do here also. WOOT! Which I think I'm going to start on right now. Although I should be working. When do I ever do that?

K So 3 posts in one day may be a little excessive

2008-07-01T00:22:00.000-05:00

But!!! I'm really excited that I managed to get everything in for ArmadilloCon Writers Workshop in time. Which now means that I have to plead with my sorority to let me have the three days off because I'm supposed to be here doing recruitment stuff. That's why I originally wasn't going to go until after this weekend I decided it would be super important toward my hopefully future career. I think if I word it that way they'll understand.

Anyway! That's all. I start summer school session 2 tomorrow. Maybe I should find out when my classes are before I go to bed. Also tomorrow morning starts day 1 of the new lifetime treadmill journal. I'm gonna stick with it! So tomorrow morning at 7 I'm going to drag my ass out of bed and go write. Then go to work and then class. Until then...
yours truly, Lola.

WOOT! Finals are over.

2008-06-30T18:28:00.000-05:00

So I just got back from my McDonald's comfort run after my last final for the first summer session. It's about RIDICULOUS that the next summer session starts tomorrow. What I'll do to be able to leave this place sooner astounds me.
Now I'm able to return to the rpg that misses me and write more (starting tomorrow morning at 7am!) as well as sleep. This weekend I didn't sleep much. But I'm about to go get my comments on the Merlin story. Edit it up and then send it off to apply for ArmadilloCon's writing workshop. Hopefully I will be able to continue cultivating my contacts with writers there for when I (hopefully) move to Austin in a year. Woot! Wouldn't that be sooooo much better than College Station? Yes I think so, too.

Also now I'm able to read again!!! Not stupid history books but all those books I couldn't read yet that I bought the other day. Right now I'm working on Mercedes Lackey's Ill Met By Moonlight. She's one of my standby good authors. I love all her stuff. But there's a lot of other stuff on my shelves too. Oh and last week I finally bit the bullet and talked to my adviser about wanting to go to graduate school. It didn't go as badly as I was afraid it would. Looks like me thinking about taking a year off might be a possibility. I think I want to do my masters at UT, that's what it's looking like now.... So if I don't get in, I doubt I can get in anywhere I want to do my PhD at, I think I'll just move to Austin, get a regular job and write full time for a year. I need to work on my second foreign language anyway and I think ACC offers Italian which is what I want to take. Or German.... Still haven't decided which to tackle next. Any opinions? lol. I love when I write these things like people read them. One day!!!! I'm a secret optimist trapped in a cynic's body. No denying it.

ApolloCon and things I learned this weekend....

2008-06-30T12:24:00.000-05:00

So... this weekend was ApolloCon I got really great comments on the Merlin Story and I have about a million new ideas for stories. Not really I think I only got 1 this weekend which I think is pretty much brilliant. Nuns that fight evil-an urban fantasy.

My favorite panel: Urban Fantasy, and it was the very last one of the convention but very worth staying that long.

My least favorite panel: Library in the Future. I love Amy Sisson, she ran the writer's workshop but because I got my times mixed up and went to that one I missed out on Archetypes in Literature. Or whatever it was called. Boo. This was this one weird dude in the Library panel that is obviously very paranoid about the government and getting viruses on his computer. Which is all a bunch of baloney to me. The government has been monitoring the books people check out for years, its not a new phenomenon.

Favorite experience: Losing a little bit more of my shyness at these things and meeting new people. People don't believe me when I say I'm introverted because they know me and when I know someone I come of out my shell. But around people I don't know I can get very anxious and awkward. lol. One particular writer was really nice and was going to buy me a beer but alas I'm still a few months shy of legal age. Bull shit law. But he introduced me to some other writers one in particular Chris Roberson who I had wanted to meet and was too nervous the night before to introduce myself to. Also I'm hoping to try to get into the Turkey City Workshop. Maybe if I can make it to ArmadilloCon I'll cultivate more of the contacts I made.

Least favorite experience: Still feeling super awkward and lame. I'm ridiculous I know but I can't help it. I promise I'm not as weird when you get to know me. Nope I take that back I'm still weird but you find out I'm actually pretty charming and you want to be my friend anyway. lol.

Other randomness:
At the Library panel I learned about Librarything.com which I think is going to be detrimental to my online health for awhile. Just what I needed another online obsession, especially one about books which of course I can't pass up. It'll take me awhile to catalog all the books I have but then again like Amy said its a record in case they ever get burned up. *shudder* God forbid.

I want to read John Moore's books. I love love parody and its very similar to what I write. Walking around the dealers room I had picked them up and thought they looked good then he was on the next panel I went to. Go figure.

Oh! I met a Russian woman and got to talk about my theory that ballet and opera are under analyzed fields. Of course I clammed up when she said hi to me in Russian and later I felt like a douche that I didn't say anything back. My spoken Russian sucks SO bad. I just get really nervous and can't remember a damn thing. I'm really good at grammar and reading but no one sees those things. Bah.

I can't remember anything else specifically that was just wow-tastic. Oh, Amy Sisson had been to Clarion West and she gave me a lot of advice about applying and what to expect. Apparently they don't have as many people apply as they want you to believe. I thought my odds were slim to none. Plus this next year I'll actually have a body of work to choose from to send off rather than trying to write two new stories in time for the deadline.

I think that's a long enough post. I'm going to try and update this thing more often since maybe the writers I meet will look at it. Also hopefully within the next year I can start getting some stories published and next year my goal is to find an agent for my book!

I should be studying for my final today instead of this. So I'm going to go back to doing so. Peace out girl scouts!

APOLLO CON!!!! and other current pursuits...

2008-06-14T11:39:00.000-05:00

SO! Here I come ApolloCon. I got chosen for the writer's workshop at ApolloCon. It's not Clarion but hey, it's a start. So that's new. Oh and that rpg below that I joined. I quit that one because they were jerks. Now I'm on Apothesis Rising an x-men style original rpg. They're all super nice and its helped get my creative character juices flowing. Also I'm on a music tour rpg to get inspiration for the NOVEL I'm writing!!! The muse story has expanding and is now a paranormal romance! I'm doing some market research on other books that are published under that genre. And I'm loving reading Undead and Unfabulous. I think I'll go finish it right now! It made me realize that I need some kind of main story line for the reader to follow and that the relationships should look secondary but really they interweave the main plot. Make sense? Lol. My dad equated it to an episode of CSI. That there's the main case, a secondary case but in the background its really about the characters relationships with others and with themselves. Kk. That's about it! Just a little update for... all of my non-existent readers. Ha! But one day I'll be a well-known author and this blog will be hopping with people wanting to know what I have to say. I like to think big. :D

I joined a new rpg today

2008-05-02T17:35:00.000-05:00

to improve my writing in a more interactive way.
http://z15.invisionfree.com/aswefall

it's very intriguing and I'm pretty excited. I rp'ed heavily all through grade school starting when I was around 11, I lied and said I was 13. But when I got to be a senior/went to college I fell off the face of the earth. I'd actually started my own boards a few times but this time I wanted to find something that I wouldn't have to be so involved in. I'm waiting to receive my power. I love that we don't have to come up with that ourselves. It really makes you learn to work with what they give you. Fun fun. I just wanted to post the url here so I wouldn't lose it.

Ok, here's the goal

2008-04-27T15:25:00.000-05:00

Fantasy WorldCon 2009 in Montreal, Cananda.

Neil Gaiman is going to be the guest of honor. I'm going to go and meet him, but I'm also going to shop out my novel. The goal is to finish my first novel by then so I can try and get it published. It's in August before grad school will start. When I saw that Neil Gaiman was the guest of honor I knew it was meant to be. Our lives are meant to be tied together. I just know it. That sounds so ridiculous but... he's the whole reason I tried hard enough for the Clarion and even though I failed at entering that I succeeded in thinking of myself as a writer. Now I know if I work hard enough for a year on my novel to finish it, I can go to WorldCon and I just know some publisher will pick up my novel. It'll work!!!!

K so...

2008-04-21T22:07:00.002-05:00

I know Karyn isn't going to read these anymore but I want to keep up with it anyway because maybe one day I'll get semi-well known and people will want to read my blogs. Plus I want to keep attempting to do treadmill journals so I'll write more often. Even when I don't have assignments.

I spent all this morning writing. For a very long time, like 8 until... 1:30. Not continuously but pretty close because my internet was out until 12:30-ish meaning that I couldn't procrastinate.

Right now I'm trying to write the damn explication that I forgot so I can send it to Karyn and beg for her not to take off points. Shit. I really need an A in this class. I'm pretty sure I'm going to get one but I want to make sure.

drusilla

2008-04-14T09:17:00.000-05:00

I want to use this name somewhere. maybe in the Xavier world. which needs to have a name and I need to work on an outline for those novels. I love outlining.

The Merlin story has taken a turn for bad ass lane! What, what! Who's brilliant?! Me! lol. No but really this next draft is gonna knock Karen's socks off. Ok I should get back to my paper on King Lear. I'm going to get started on the new draft of Merlin tonight though. I'm super excited its all coming together, which makes me think about what I'm writing next after this. Maybe I should go back and finish the muse story. But then again maybe I should keep going with what's looking like a collection of humorous short stories with the Amazon who wants to be a housewife and the unlikely hero in a lowly Shepherd named... Shep. lol. Yes I know lame but it just fits and he won't have any other name. *shrug* But they all fit together really well and I hope I can market them together, or at least one day I'll market them together maybe after my novel comes out. The publisher can put these out in anticipation of the next installment in the series. That will send my fame sky rocketing, because here will be this serious commentary on family loyalties and world politics then BAM! hilarious commentaries on archetypes. :D Maybe I'll work on my novel next. Even though I really do want to finish the Muse story. humpf. That one paragraph I had was really good and I thought a great starting place it was finally taking shape. Ok SHAKESPEARE PAPER!!! That's what I need to concentrate on. I might put the outline for my paper up. Since this is supposed to be my lit crit blog too.

Workshopping (sp?)

2008-04-04T12:16:00.002-05:00

So I spent last night reading David's story, which I loved and want to read more of. Today I've read the others, I'm still working on Sarah's even though I got drawn in yesterday when I was printing them off and had already read the first few pages. Everyone's stories so far are great! I've just written some minor things. About confusing word choice or mixing up pronouns and their antecedent. Stuff that I probably have too because it's really hard to read for that stuff yourself. Because you know what you meant to say and even when you proofread you don't catch it because your mind skips over it.

I really want to start a writers circle. I wonder if anyone in our class would be interested. Maybe in a general workshop and also a genre specific one. I think there might be a few other people who write genre fiction too. When we get closer to the end of the year I think I'll bring it up.

Anyway I just wanted to clock in basically that I've gotten about three hours of work done in the past few days. I'll be writing a lot over the weekend too. I'm excited and nervous about the workshop today. I need to type up my comments before class. Bah Shakespeare test today. Screw that. I haven't even looked at my notes yet.

Ok. Hard core here it comes...

2008-03-31T12:18:00.002-05:00

I'm going to decide from what I've recently read on how I'm going about these revisions. Since I have to write an explication about it making the decisions before hand will let me make these revisions go faster and writing the explication too.

1. I want to write the ride to his mothers house from the point of view of his pony. Mercedes Lackey did this in The Oathbound. I'm going to photocopy the page for you.
2. I'm going to work on editing the "thinking" passages according to Juan Morales' example use of sound to create a feeling in Newspaper Story. I want these parts to flow better and more accurately reflect his feelings. I dunno somehow in my explications I'll bullshit my way through that.
3. I think after arriving at his mothers house I want to change the point of view momentarily to his mothers. Since the visit is unexpected and I think we can get a better idea of Merlin's past also from her. Maybe I can tie this into something Mercedes Lackey did too... I dunno I have to write the first few parts first. Then I'll figure this one out.

This week I'm going to continue with my reading/writing with a goal way of treadmilling...

Writer's Quote of the day:
I was going to find something on perseverance but glanced at the topic of Professor first. This made me laugh out loud. I've been thinking a lot lately about how I think being a professor is really the right thing for me. Anyway I also LOVE W. H. Auden. I might use some of his poems to revise my next draft.
"A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep." W.H. Auden

Grrrr

2008-03-31T10:47:00.002-05:00

A lot of shit is going on with me right now and I shouldn't let it overwhelm me but it is. Trying to put aside my worries to actually get some writing done isn't working out for me.

Everything I seem to write this morning is total crap. Oh well. Neil says when you feel like you're writing crap you should just keep doing it then figure out on the morrow what's really crap and what was actually ok. However I have to turn in today so whatever crap I spew is getting graded. ARGH!

I want to go back to sleep and not wake up until tomorrow.
I'm going to continue feeling sorry for myself until I finish my cup of coffee. Then I may do some cleaning to clear my thoughts. Then at 12 for sure I'm going to try and finish up whatever I have add in some revision things and write an explication. I have class at 1:50 that I can't miss so yeah. Hopefully I finish by then. I'm not going to do so well on this assignment. Garrrr!!

Great weekend for Writing

2008-03-30T14:15:00.003-05:00

I shouldn't have skipped Shakespeare on friday but I don't think(or at least I hope I haven't) I have too many absences yet. I actually go to that class more religiously then any of the others. Here's how it all went down and the main things I learned/gleaned from my experiences with Aggiecon:

Wednesday night: My first experience with the science fiction/fantasy club. Interesting to say the least. I admit that I'm at least equally as nerdy as most of them however I'm a lot more socially functional. But these are the audience I'll be writing for. I need to learn to get them to respect me and interact with them. However I'm not sure I want to join Cepheid Variables (that's what the club is called). The con was actually run horribly for an event. Very unorganized, from being in a sorority and running a huge scale event myself, it could have been done a lot better. The guests should have been treated a lot better as well. I digress.

Thursday afternoon/night: There was a writing workshop by Jeff Turner that started at 3. We ended up going until 8 and I learned SOOO much. The main advice I'm going to carry out asap was to finish my work. Then go back and edit it. What he said made a lot of sense. That after you finish it the sense of accomplishment will bolster your spirits. He thinks actually getting to the end is the most important part because over editing yourself before you get to the end is what he thinks keeps a lot of writers from ever finishing anything. I know there's a lot of stuff that needs to be added but I think I'll feel better when it's actually finished. THEN go back and add the stuff that needs to be added. ALSO! Jeff offered to read my story but I wasn't able to talk to him again. So I'm going to try and find his email. He made me feel a lot better about my chances for odyssey but also gave me a lot to think about. I think I'll see if I actually get in first then figure out whether I want to go or not.

Friday: I went to a few panels. Todd McCafferey said he wants a signed copy of my first book. haha. I think he was just being nice but it did its job.
I hate to say this but I definitely think being around these people has boosted my self esteem. And I think me being attractive will work to my advantage. I was late to one of the panels on saturday and one of the guy writers was like, "it's ok she's cute we'll let it slide." and I actually really tried to downplay myself. I wore only t-shirts and jeans all three days. lol. I digress but I just found it an interesting observation that I can perhaps use this to my advantage in the future when making connections. There was a panel on Mythical Creatures that was interesting. Not much more interesting happened Friday. Oh I forgot there was also an interesting panel on archetypes vs. stereotypes which I found very fascinating. Darlene Bolesny was on that one too.

Saturday morning/afternoon: I went to a bunch of panels the first one was How the Publishing Industry works and they gave a lot of good advice. I think I also really surprised them when at the end I asked if they thought what they write is of literary value. It was something that occurred to me on friday. Because I mean I want to spend my life's work (criticism-wise) on trying to convince people that fantasy writing is important to the cannon. But I wondered whether the writers themselves thought about it. They were all really impressed with the question and pleasantly taken aback. One of them Steven Brust, who actually lives in college station and I want to try and cultivating that contact, said here's the short answer ... if you want the long answer you can follow me outside as I smoke a cigarette. So I followed him outside after the panel was over and talked to him and Darlene Bolesny, another of the guest writers, for awhile. I'm working now on trying to cultivate all the writers I met. Networking at these convention is apparently very important.
Another really interesting thing I got from the panels that day was at the young adult writers panel. How to write for a young adult audience, try to get said novel published and what sets them apart from adult novels. Also it was said you can make a lot more money in young adult because book sales are usually higher. It makes sense. But from everything they said I think the xavier stories may by young adult but because of the complexity I want it to have bordering adult. Like His Dark Materials kind of. I never even thought of them as young adult novels but now I can see where they might be. We'll see.... Or if I don't want them to be young adult I need to change some stuff. Just depends.

ANYWAY! Over all. I really want to be the writers doing these panels. I wanted to be the one answering everyone's questions. But I also think I decided I do not ever want to be a professional writer. I want to write, I want to get published and of course achieve some sort of fame but I don't ever want to start living deadline to deadline. I write for my own enjoyment and to hopefully others, as well as to get my ideas out there in the world. I love teaching people about this kind of stuff and I love literary criticism and applying it to fantasy. Being a professor and being around the kinds of people who provoke thought I think will only help make me a good writer. I don't ever want to quick teaching even if I make enough off writing one day(which I'm not worrying about).

I'm going to take a nap now. Thinking about all that happened this weekend made me exhausted. This week I'm imposing word limits on everyday. And I'm going to try and start getting up early in the morning to write. One of the writers said when you have a job or go to school and write you have to figure out a way to use your brain better. Because if you don't write until you get home in the afternoon your brain is already worn out from thinking all day. She had to make herself become a morning person so she could get writing done.

Writer's thought/quote of the day:
Jeff turner had many theories. I'll share them all with you, I think you'd enjoy them and he names them all. lol. But one he said was really good that writing is like jogging. The time you have to stretch before you're warmed up to run lessens the more often you do it. So the more you write the less time it takes you to focus when you sit down to write. It's a lot like what you've been telling us just with a catchier name and better metaphor.
:D Maybe you can use it on your future classes. I know I'll be using it on mine. I definitely want to get my mfa eventually because I would love to teach creative writing. I'm not just trying to flatter you, you've really inspired me. A combination of you and Abby Bowers are what I aspire to be like when I'm a professor. Neither one of you puts up with any crap, which good students respect you for. You identify with your students, you're on their level but they also learn a lot from you. Both of you stretch your students limits and let them see they have all kinds of potential that they never knew they had. Thanks for being you, despite the man (A&M) trying to keep you down. Keep your chin up. You're making a difference.

Reading with Intent

2008-03-26T11:56:00.002-05:00

Too bad I'm reading books mostly about strong women characters and the story I'm writing is about a not so strong man. However I have learned a lot lately from things I've read. Some notes on things I've read in the past weeks:

Oathblood by Mercedes Lackey
-She had a very poignant way of opening the novel and setting everything up by showing it through the point of view of a bird. I think I want to show to trip to his mother's house from the point of view of his pony but to spice it up a bit.

Mordant's Need (The Mirror of her Dreams and A Man Rides Through) by Stephen Donaldson
-He had this amazing way of characterizing/describing peripheral characters. Every time he used to same metaphor or even one specific word but it never got redundant. Like the word phlegmatic to describe a soldier. It was great. So I want to think about the characters in my stories the same way. It gives them instant and memorable characterization but doesn't take away from the main characters at all.
-Also Donaldson did a great job of having distinct themes that were continued through the whole duo logy. And he used them in a lot of different ways. I really want to incorporate this into my writing too. I had come up with something for the Merlin story while walking across campus but now I can't remember what it was. Damn, it'll come back to me if it was important I guess.

Lady of the Forest by Jennifer Roberson
-I've read a lot of her other books too. the 8 parts series about the Cheysuli. Each novel is SO long but I never get bored. She's a great writer so I want to reread the stuff I have read by her and read new stuff like the book I'm reading now that's about Mady Marian. It's a recreation of the Robin Hood myth and so far I can't put it down.
-Since she too is taking well-known characters and writing a new or improved I guess story about them I want to learn from what she's doing.
-One thing I do know so far is that she did her research on the topic of Robin Hood. So I'm going to try and do more research on Merlin.

Writer's Quote of the Day:
"The reconstruction of popular myth carries with it the burden of preconception and expection;"
-Jennifer Roberson

Humpf

2008-03-22T20:51:00.000-05:00

I need to write some nonfiction stuff about my aunt Vida. However I think some good stuff would come out of it. My Aunt Vida was such a quirky independent woman who was my kindred spirit and I honestly think I could write a whole book about her. It would all be funny and good too because she had so many idiosyncracies and amazing qualities. She would be SOOO proud of me for wanting to be a writer and pursue English. I wish she was still here to talk to about all of it. She would have been 98 this April. I might go to her grave tomorrow. I was reading some emails from around the time she was starting to go down my mom had saved on the family computer. It dredged up a lot of memories. *sigh* I wish she hadn't given up. I know this is my literary blog and here I am gushing about family but the point was to get down some thoughts about my aunt and remind myself that there's an amazing story to be written about her. God I miss her so much. Especially around holidays since she was such a big part of our family back then. Ok peace out. I REALLY need to buckle down and get in some serious writing hours this week. I have to do a writer's review thing for missing all my hours this week. I did a lot of reading but not so much writing. I didn't bother logging any of the reading either I should have but oh well. I'm not looking forward to writing that 8 page shakespeare analysis. Ugh.

Woot!

2008-03-12T20:31:00.000-05:00

Well I'm still doing research for the other world I cooked up last weekend. So far I'm having a really hard time deciding exactly where I want these tribes to live. Plains, forest, mountains, near the sea, near the equator or far from it? *sigh* I dunno. And I want it to be mine. Not like other books I've read that had tribal type people. Grr. This is going to take a lot more research than I originally thought. Boo.
Anyway the exciting part is that I started watching The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and randomly wikipedia'd it. Apparently the original comic book by Alan Moore had elements of what they called steampunk. I'm at least aware of cyberpunk even though I'm not familiar with it. So I then clicked on that to see what wikipedia thought about that topic. (Yes at this point I'm very off task of what I originally was supposed to be researching, however these things tend to work out well for me. I was watching TV when the beginning of the muse story hit me.) I had kind of taken a break from the Xavier world let's call it because I was running into a problem with setting. I wanted it to be set in the future an alternate future kind of. But then I was like shit I'll have to deal with advanced technology. And honestly I don't want to have to get that creative and more advanced technology raises all kinds of questions, blah blah blah. A bunch of crap I don't want to deal with basically. Then I thought well I'll put it in the past then and make it an alternate history kind of thing. BUT!!! I wanted it to be modern too, because I want to raise questions about what's going on today. With global warming and world powers competing.... Anyway. NOW!!! If you look up steampunk its apparently a victorian setting with technology like todays but in victorian terms of steam power and clockworks. How cool?! Perfect for my world. Because it'll be modern day but not. The whole futuristic thing didn't have the right nostalgic kind of feel I wanted for certain things. Blah blah blah. Anyway. So I'm going to do some research on Victorian times. Maybe I can take a class on it! ...? or maybe not. I don't have to be an expert on it to be able to imagine it. So tonight's research came up with something useful. I love how these things tend to work themselves out over time.